I came across a Facebook post that talked a little bit about Stay at Home Moms and what it feels like to be us. I'm going to dive into that a little bit more on a personal level.
Before I had my son, I was a workaholic, literally. I didn't know what to do with myself besides work and party with my friends for a few hours before it was time to return to work. I lived by myself and had no other responsibilities, so I was free as a bird to do as I pleased.
When Brennan came along that all changed; I couldn't work because of the physical strain of pregnancy, which I highly disliked because I loved my job (I worked in Food Service). My coworkers were my extended family.
My entire world changed after I had my little bundle of joy. There was no returning to work. My days became filled with diaper changes, constant feedings, lots of crying, from the both of us. It felt so different; there is no amount of preparation in the world that can prepare you for taking care of an infant.
It was such a change that it took a lot adjusting. Before my son was a year old, I tried going back to work, but that didn't work. I was leaving early in the morning and coming home late in the evening. Brennan was asleep when I left and just before going to sleep when I came back at night.
Working and being a mom clashed. The workaholic in me died, and the Stay at Home Mom was born. It's not all cupcakes and rainbows. Especially not with my rambunctious mini-me. I spend my days watching out for this tiny person, and it couldn't be more rewarding.
We have our days that it doesn't go so well, but for the most part, we get along. I see Brennan more than I see anybody else. I'm like the KiKi from the movie "Bad Moms" I don't have friends that I get to visit.
I get depressed about not being able to do the things that I would like to do without him, but I manage. Irritation happens. After so many hours of seeing the same person or repeating the same task a hundred times, it gets to a point where the only thing that is going to fix it is a quick (ugly) cry in the laundry room or the shower. Half the time I don't know why I'm crying, but I do know that it's therapeutic.
Being a Stay at Home Mom means there is no more of the alone time that I would like or crave, by the end of the night when I finally get some personal time with my partner I fall asleep on him, and I get no adult interaction.
It's stressful for me since my life changed from no responsibilities and being a workaholic to caring for a miniature version of myself. I've been a mom for three years now and the two halves of me, workaholic and Mom, still argue with each other.
Being a mother is a rewarding experience, and I would never change it for anything.