This is it. You have to do it.
Living the rest of your life abiding by the social rules of a narcissist is nothing short of living in your own personal hell. You may have heard this term thrown around; you may have even been avoiding it. It's time to stop living in the shadow of someone else's ego.
It's time to face the facts.
Narcissists will not validate your opinion or feelings if they differ the slightest bit from their own. Standing up to them poses an internal conflict for you every single day.
But, you have to follow through.
You will feel defeated and useless in explaining your side of the story, and you may even feel obligated to argue in attempt to get through to said narcissist.
Realistically, you can't-- and you shouldn't.
The only reason narcissists have any power over others is because people give it to them. The only way to have any chance at putting that into check is to not submit.
It is not your job to fix them or fall victim to their self-pity parties and endless guilt trips.
It is not your job to defend or justify their actions when others are upset by them.
It is not your job to put your own wants and needs before theirs because it's easier than dealing with conflict.
It's not your job to deal with the conflict either.
I'm willing to bet you've hesitated to do it for so long because of the manipulation. Just when you're ready to call it quits, you remember all of the trivial things that will be held over your head to turn the blame around on you.
Don't be swayed-- you've done so much more for them than they've ever done for you. However, they will rarely let you take credit for it and will usually have a reason to undermine your actions.
They've already drained you physically, emotionally and (probably) financially. Put a stop to it.
Ask yourself this: in any given context, would they have the same loyalty to and respect for you as you do them?
If the answer is "no" for the majority of situations, then it's time for you to move on. Don't worry about how they will react. You will be absolutely amazed at the amount of positivity that will start to flow once you pull the plug.
Life is way too short-- don't waste it sacrificing your own happiness for the sake of those who don't deserve theirs.