For Those Who Aren't Sure Who They Are Anymore
Start writing a post
Student Life

To Those Who Aren't Sure Who They Are Anymore

How you can have stability even when you aren't sure who you are.

298
To Those Who Aren't Sure Who They Are Anymore

Have you ever wondered how to be genuinely yourself? I actually ask myself the question of 'Who am I?' often. It's a weird thing to not know exactly who you are. Sometimes the line of "you" is undefined and hard to find, even though you're the one that drew it, kind of.

Sometimes I just don't have an opinion because I'm pretty adjustable. This in turn, however, carries some uneasiness, and I don't really feel individual. Some women are so confident, so sure, and so grounded in what they know, who they are, and what makes them, them. I know what I certainly want to be: kind, funny, clever, sweet, enjoyed, fun, whole, interesting, a bit quiet, wonderful.

And so I sift through hobbies that I think are going to somehow mold me into these characteristics.

I look to creativity, pictures, exercising, sports, culture, writing, reading, my husband.

Seems like really fluffy things when I write them down, but sometimes, these things are my default to the answer to satisfaction. Images and thoughts and ideas that might give some sort of definition to "me". Maybe that's why we take so many pictures so that we can help define our lives, and help others know who we are. But sometimes I wonder if I really want to know the exact and refined version of myself. I don't know if I want to find out that I'm not really as interesting or wonderful as I thought I was.

We all actually have potential that builds. Potential to laugh freely, to give when it hurts, to worship, to humble ourselves and it really is beautiful, it really is interesting, it really is wonderful. But we also have this innate ability to lose ourselves and to say things we don't mean, allowing timidness to crowd our senses, and for the question of "Who am I?" to rise again and again.

When there was the actual reality of the uprooting of my familiarity, of moving and leaving a home, a job, a church, a community, family, and an environment, pieces of me started to fall away, and it was because I defined who I was by those things. And then after moving, getting a new job, and marrying a human being, I was found in the middle of a conversation with someone I didn't know, at a job I didn't know, in a place I didn't know, asking myself, 'how do I usually respond to people again?" It was like I kind of forgot how to react as I would, cause I wasn't really sure who "I" was. Stability isn't the human's strong point, we are creatures of inconsistency. Individuals are quiet, hurting, unsure seasons and then there are the so sure of yourself, easy seasons.

Despite all of this, I knew that a solid, linear peace of mind did and does exist that's free to explore, and that's true and stable and never changing. This truth that has taken me from questioning to assuredness is this: His eternal relationship with us. A very definite Truth, a drawn line, a sure thing, and the only One that can understand and define every piece of me with the most exquisitely precise lines, is Jesus. I'm realizing that we, as people, will never be stable, and even though familiar things really agree with me, the truth is, the only thing that will ever remain constant and stable enough to rely on is Him.

Familiarity is really nice but far lovelier than this is genuineness before God, yourself, and others. Know that you are a daughter of the King, loved, held, and cherished. Know that He is far greater and beautiful. And know that of all things unsure, there's one sureness known and found in the love and sacrifice of Jesus Christ for you, and that is something that can never be stripped of you, sweet friend.

Report this Content
This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
Student Life

Waitlisted for a College Class? Here's What to Do!

Dealing with the inevitable realities of college life.

43031
college students waiting in a long line in the hallway
StableDiffusion

Course registration at college can be a big hassle and is almost never talked about. Classes you want to take fill up before you get a chance to register. You might change your mind about a class you want to take and must struggle to find another class to fit in the same time period. You also have to make sure no classes clash by time. Like I said, it's a big hassle.

This semester, I was waitlisted for two classes. Most people in this situation, especially first years, freak out because they don't know what to do. Here is what you should do when this happens.

Keep Reading...Show less
a man and a woman sitting on the beach in front of the sunset

Whether you met your new love interest online, through mutual friends, or another way entirely, you'll definitely want to know what you're getting into. I mean, really, what's the point in entering a relationship with someone if you don't know whether or not you're compatible on a very basic level?

Consider these 21 questions to ask in the talking stage when getting to know that new guy or girl you just started talking to:

Keep Reading...Show less
Lifestyle

Challah vs. Easter Bread: A Delicious Dilemma

Is there really such a difference in Challah bread or Easter Bread?

27025
loaves of challah and easter bread stacked up aside each other, an abundance of food in baskets
StableDiffusion

Ever since I could remember, it was a treat to receive Easter Bread made by my grandmother. We would only have it once a year and the wait was excruciating. Now that my grandmother has gotten older, she has stopped baking a lot of her recipes that require a lot of hand usage--her traditional Italian baking means no machines. So for the past few years, I have missed enjoying my Easter Bread.

Keep Reading...Show less
Adulting

Unlocking Lake People's Secrets: 15 Must-Knows!

There's no other place you'd rather be in the summer.

952034
Group of joyful friends sitting in a boat
Haley Harvey

The people that spend their summers at the lake are a unique group of people.

Whether you grew up going to the lake, have only recently started going, or have only been once or twice, you know it takes a certain kind of person to be a lake person. To the long-time lake people, the lake holds a special place in your heart, no matter how dirty the water may look.

Keep Reading...Show less
Student Life

Top 10 Reasons My School Rocks!

Why I Chose a Small School Over a Big University.

141854
man in black long sleeve shirt and black pants walking on white concrete pathway

I was asked so many times why I wanted to go to a small school when a big university is so much better. Don't get me wrong, I'm sure a big university is great but I absolutely love going to a small school. I know that I miss out on big sporting events and having people actually know where it is. I can't even count how many times I've been asked where it is and I know they won't know so I just say "somewhere in the middle of Wisconsin." But, I get to know most people at my school and I know my professors very well. Not to mention, being able to walk to the other side of campus in 5 minutes at a casual walking pace. I am so happy I made the decision to go to school where I did. I love my school and these are just a few reasons why.

Keep Reading...Show less

Subscribe to Our Newsletter

Facebook Comments