In this day and age, finding a college student who isn't working ridiculous hours for an absurd amount of pay is almost unheard of. Everyone is trying to save a pretty penny over the summer before we have to go back to school and devote all of our time to hitting the books and going to class. If you're like me, you love having the purpose of going to work and knowing you're earning a paycheck—and you also love spending your paycheck. However, if you're like me, you've noticed a couple things about the competition of earning money.
I am the oldest of three children. Well actually, I am one minute older than my twin brother and one grade older than my little brother. We have all been working since we were 16. The whole family worked together at the local tavern down the street from our house, hosting and assembling food in the kitchen to make minimum wage and a few spare tips. With all of us making the same amount, it was always a competition of who could save up the most money. I, being a girl who likes going out to lunch and shopping at the mall, would always fall short of my brothers. In the past, it did not bother me because I am a firm believer that being a girl is way more expensive than being a boy. With all the beauty products and fashion pieces we are almost expected to have, my brothers definitely had less to spend their money on than I did. After all, I always try to point out that my twin brother owns three pairs of shorts that my parents bought for him. There is no sympathy in my house for the only girl in the family who likes brand name sandals, however. Back then, it seemed to be all fun and games.
Recently, it has come to my attention how much my brothers and I are actually competing to make more money than each other, though. I'm happy to say that with the jobs all three of us have this summer, we are each making more than we ever did at that tavern. But a few weeks ago, my dad came home from the bank with receipts from all of our bank accounts. In the middle of the kitchen, he projected like an announcer in a boxing ring, "In first place we have Twin with an impressive $$$ in his account, and next up, we have Little Brother with a remarkable $$$ in his possession, and bringing up the rear, we have Kim coming in last with $$$." I hated coming in last. But then it occurred to me that coming in last shouldn't mean anything. There has always been competition between me and my brothers from the moment we could talk. Who is the fastest runner? Who is getting the best grades? But this time, I didn't want to have to compete with them for something that is my business. I was proud of all the money I had saved up, but, apparently, it didn't mean anything if I was behind my brothers.
The concept of "who can make the most money" is something that everyone is familiar with. After all, the reason any of us go to college or work somewhere is to eventually climb to the top and make the most money we can. But the competition starts when you're young and doesn't just stop in your family. When you have friends who are like family, to whom you tell everything, competition can arise in those relationships.
Remember that time your best friend got that amazing job that pays super well, and she basically doesn't have to do anything? Remember when you were breaking your back at that old workplace for under minimum wage? You know what that made you feel: frustration, envy, and above all, jealousy. That is all it is. It's unfair when you are working just as hard, or even harder than your friends, and not getting what you're worth. But you don't really want the money, you want the stuff that comes along with the money. You want to be able to go out to eat with your girls at that expensive restaurant without having to worry about having enough in your account.
If I've learned anything from this past summer, it is that money rivalry is unavoidable. You love your family, you love your friends, but whether it is conscious or not, you want to make more money than them. You want to save more money, too. That doesn't mean you're less of a good person for wanting this. Some competition is actually healthy because it further motivates you to work your hardest. At the end of the day, it's all friendly competition and not a big deal in the grand scheme of life. You should also remember that spending your money isn't a big deal.
I am passionate about ending spend-shaming. I would constantly get shamed by my parents and brothers for spending my money. My money. I could never go out to lunch or go buy myself a new pair of shoes without my dad checking my account and making me feel guilty for it. But here's the thing—I shouldn't feel guilty for spending my money. I work hard for my money, and I should spend it how I want. And the same for you—if it makes you happy, how bad could it be?
I'm not saying that you should blow your next paycheck at the outlets. I'm not saying you should punish yourself the moment you buy a soda at the food court. It's all about balance. You should save up some money because you don't know what kind of opportunities are awaiting you in the unforeseeable future. But, you shouldn't just leave all of your money in a bank account just to sit there. I'm not an accountant—I'm not even that good at math—but from my experience, I can only tell you this: you should never feel guilty about buying things that make you happy, and a little competition is great motivation to succeed.
Good luck to all of you.
