In the season of Hallmark and Lifetime airing chick-flicky Christmas movies with the same plot over and over and over, it can be easy to fall into the impression that life works out like these perfect screenplays. I’m here to say: Sorry, it’s not like that at all.
Of course, the falling in love part does feel like this, or it should. The butterflies, the fun dates, the jitters you get when you say “I love you” for the first time. Everyone deserves a whirlwind romance that feels like something out of a book or movie.
It’s the falling out of love that feels nothing like this, as much as we wished it did.
The pain that gets fifteen minutes tops of screen time in a movie doesn’t flutter away that quickly in reality. This is a pain that lasts weeks, maybe months.
The wacky best friend that scoops in to save her BFF with a rebound date, some chocolate, and “Dirty Dancing”? She’s busy with finals and could be hundreds of miles away at her college.
The wise elderly person who magically gets the couple back together? Yeah, sorry. Not there.
The guy’s kind best friend who tells you your guy missed you? Nope, he probably tells the guy to get over you over a beer and is trying to hook him up with someone new.
And finally: the valiant guy who returns with this whole magic plan to win his lady love back? First, if someone goes to this length to get you back, please, tell me where you find people to date. But typically, there is no knight in shining armor or the guy who half-ass tries to win you back.
I know this is the season of happiness and cheer, but I honestly think these movies have harmed my own expectations for love and it’s like ripping a new Band-Aid off every, single, day.
These expectations leave me disappointed all the time and no matter how many times I get disappointed, my crazy expectations never get lower.
I’ll never let myself become some bitter person who doesn’t believe in love that wants to shoot lasers from my eyes at couples. However, I can no longer let cheesy romances leave me disappointed with my own love life.