Some Friendships Are Not Always Black And White | The Odyssey Online
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Some Friendships Are Not Always Black And White

This is worth fighting for.

11
Some Friendships Are Not Always Black And White
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I’m reaching out to you and you’re pushing me away. It’s like I’m screaming at this wall wishing it will fall, but you have no interest in letting me in. I’m reaching and reaching but now I’m sore. I don’t know how much longer I can do this for. I see this connection that I know is there. The moments you look up at me and stare. I see something so raw, natural and beautiful. Is it just that I’m not suitable? I know you love the way that you can. But I hate feeling as if I’m less than. I would never do anything different if I could. I’ve done everything the way that I should. You know that I’m here, but I want to make sure I’ll be there when you fall. You’ve been there for me so many times, and I’ll be here for a lifetime. I’m not going anywhere so don’t push me away. This needs to be clear: I’m going to stay. I’m not trying to change who you are. I love everything about the person you are. You make happy when times are hard, and I’m forever grateful for all that you’ve done.

For all we’ve been through, this won’t be the end. Just because you’re leaving doesn’t mean I won’t be your friend. That’s what we are anyway, best friends. I hope you know you won’t lose me. I’m scared of change, that’s for sure. This doesn’t mean it’s not good. I’ll get by; I always do. I just want to make sure you know I’m here for you. When times get hard or when they’re a breeze, I’m someone you can count on with ease. I know you’ll be busy and you’ll have your fun. Just know that I’m here without hesitation.

You won’t let me in and I think that’s OK. Please know that I love you just in that way. Don’t take this lightly for it’s something to see. It won’t be easy but I’m doing it for me. Selfish it may seem. I need you here for the time to come. I don’t know what the future holds, but there’s a lot to be done.

So I’ll keep reaching, and reaching, and reaching, and reaching. Hoping that you see me. Just look at me and hear what I’m preaching. We are opposites for one, but this can’t be undone. You mean the world to me. This is what I need you to see. Meet me halfway if you can. If you can’t, we will make a new plan.

There’s something so real. You know it’s there. Don’t leave me like I fear. Just know I’ll always be right here.
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