So... This Is America?

So... This Is America?

The land of the free? The home of the brave?
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I. Am. Outraged.

I am angry that I live in a country filled with entitled individuals. I am angry I live in a country filled with individuals that openly hate other individuals that are different from them. I am angry that something that this has happened; could happen. I am angry that the country isn't in more of an uproar that this happened. I am angry that people died. I am angry that there are people in this country who feel they need to cleanse it of all people that are non-white. I am angry that there are so many people all over the country that feel this way.

The sound of my own screaming scared me.

I. Am. Terrified.

I am scared because history is beginning to repeat itself. I am scared because I am a woman. I am scared because I am African-American. I am scared for my brothers and sisters who are Jewish, African-American, Gay, or any of the other groups that these terrorists are targeting. I am scared because we have only seen some of the people that feel this way. I am scared because I am literally seeing America divide itself. I am scared because hatred and violence will only breed more hatred and violence... and no one seems to get that. I am scared for America and all it's people.

I sobbed uncontrollably... until my eyes hurt and my head was throbbing.

I. Am. Numb.

This division has been brewing for years. Anyone who doesn't know this or tries to act like it's new is misinformed. I have spent years now crying over senseless violence. I have spent years asking myself why my skin color is a problem when I didn't even chose it. I have spent years asking how you can hate someone for their religion or sexual orientation. I have spent years praying to GOD asking him to heal this country. This country is hurting on both sides and it is weighing on me. I'm tired of being smart enough to know that this country doesn't belong to one group of people. I'm tired of being smart enough to know that racism is wrong and that no group of people is superior to the other. I am tired of wondering what's wrong with me. I am tired of hearing people trying to compare the Black Lives Matter movement to other terrorist groups. I am tired of having to explain why we even say Black Lives Matter. I'll say it once more here: It is not a statement that in anyway is trying to imply that all other lives do not matter, but seeing how Black people can be shot, killed, and nothing happens... it seems to me that our lives aren't valued as high, so we shout a reminder that despite our melanin, we matter too.

I am numb. I've cried way too many tears over people I don't know. Not just Black people, but all people who are discriminated against and oppressed. All people who are made to feel like they are scum or worthless or don't belong in this country just because they are different or unique. Just they don't follow the status quo. I don't want to box in a specific group of people because I know not everyone feels the same way the terrorist feel. Some of these people are fighting along side the minority groups. Some of them have even lost their lives.

I, unlike the people who hate me without knowing me, do not blame one group of people. I blame a mindset. I blame a belief system that causes certain individuals to believe that this country belongs to them. I blame the justice system. I blame a thought process that makes people believe that it is there duty to clear out anyone different from them. Most of all I blame hatred. It is a seed, that if tended t,o can destroy a person. Make them cold and bitter and do terrible. It can make them blind. It can cause wars and division.

I don't hate anyone. I refuse to allow this evil to corrupt me. So instead I'm just angry, terrified and numb. I'm at a loss of words, but thankfully never a loss of hope. I pray that one day this country is able to put itself back together. And I pray it happens before the hatred and evil cause this country to burn.

I pledge allegiance to the flag, of the "United" States of America, and to the republic for which it stands. One nation, under GOD, indivisible, with liberty and justice for ALL.

Cover Image Credit: https://www.flickr.com/photos/philhillphotography

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6 Things You Should Know About The Woman Who Can't Stand Modern Feminism

Yes, she wants to be heard too.

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2018 is sort of a trap for this woman. She believes in women with all of the fire inside of her, but it is hard for her to offer support when people are making fools of themselves and disguising it as feminism.

The fact of the matter is that women possess qualities that men don't and men possess qualities that women don't. That is natural. Plus, no one sees men parading the streets in penis costumes complaining that they don't get to carry their own fetus for nine months.

1. She really loves and values women.

She is incredibly proud to be a woman.

She knows the amount of power than a woman's presence alone can hold. She sees when a woman walks into a room and makes the whole place light up. She begs that you won't make her feel like a "lady hater" because she doesn't want to follow a trend that she doesn't agree with.

2. She wants equality, too

She has seen the fundamental issues in the corporate world, where women and men are not receiving equal pay.

She doesn't cheer on the businesses that don't see women and men as equivalents. But she does recognize that if she works her butt off, she can be as successful as she wants to.

3. She wears a bra.

While she knows the "I don't have to wear a bra for society" trend isn't a new one, but she doesn't quite get it. Like maybe she wants to wear a bra because it makes her feel better. Maybe she wears a bra because it is the normal things to do... And that's OK.

Maybe she wants to put wear a lacy bra and pretty makeup to feel girly on .a date night. She is confused by the women who claim to be "fighting for women," because sometimes they make her feel bad for expressing her ladyhood in a different way than them.

4. She hates creeps just as much as you do. .

Just because she isn't a feminist does not mean that she is cool with the gruesome reality that 1 in 5 women are sexually abused.

In fact, this makes her stomach turn inside out to think about. She knows and loves people who have been through such a tragedy and wants to put the terrible, creepy, sexually charged criminals behind bars just as bad as the next woman.

Remember that just because she isn't a feminist doesn't mean she thinks awful men can do whatever they want.

5. There is a reason she is ashamed of 2018's version of feminism.

She looks at women in history who have made a difference and is miserably blown away by modern feminism's performance.

Not only have women in the past won themselves the right to vote, but also the right to buy birth control and have credit cards in their names and EVEN saw marital rape become a criminal offense.

None of them dressed in vagina costumes to win anyone over though... Crazy, right?

6. She isn't going to dress in a lady parts costume to prove a point.

This leaves her speechless. It is like the women around her have absolutely lost their minds and their agendas, only lessening their own credibility.

"Mom, what are those ladies on TV dressed up as?"

"Ummm... it looks to me like they are pink taco's honey."

She loves who she is and she cherished what makes her different from the men around her. She doesn't want to compromise who she is as a woman just so she can be "equal with men."

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Believe It Or Not, Trump Is Not An Idiot

I know this headline is scary, but hear me out.

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If we were to place all of the smartest people in the world on a stage, Trump would be sitting (angrily I'm sure) in the audience. I do not think that Trump is an extraordinarily smart man. In fact, I wouldn't even consider him an ordinarily smart man. However, to call him an idiot would somehow diminish all of the harmful things he has done. To call Trump an idiot is to take away from how dangerous he truly is. To be clear, he is not dangerous because of his status, or his power, or even his money. He is dangerous because of his hate. If all of the hostility that man carries isn't enough, he holds alongside him a troop of people as equally, if not more so, hateful than he is. What is more dangerous than an old bigot you ask? An old bigot who is less intelligent than his supervisors. There is something much more daunting about an old man who can not make decisions for himself.

Often the criticisms I see of Trump and his administration center around his personal intelligence, capability, and shortcomings. Very rarely do I see the same attacks on the people guiding him, supporting him, or enabling him. Although I think Trump is a vile human being, I think he is often a distraction. At the end of the day, Trump cannot pass legislation by himself, he cannot fight wars on his own, and he can't run this country into the ground by his lonesome (granted I believe he wishes he could). To be completely transparent I think the latter action has been happening for decades. I think we have made, as a country, some very very poor decisions that have led us here. Although I think we are seeing a cascade of events that have been placed like dominos by our democracy, my focus is on the current situation.

So where does that leave us? In wildfires that our president blames on poor use of controlled deforestation while simultaneously cutting funding to conservation programs? In the potential wake of empty and careless threats of nuclear warfare? In states with steadily deteriorating infrastructure and education? In hospitals that we cannot pay bills for because our healthcare has slowly been torn from us?

It is important to remember that there are, unfortunately, people with much worse intentions than Trump. There are people working every day to mold the country into what works best for them. We are so often distracted that we forget that one family holds 40% of the wealth in this country, that our economy is disenfranchising a large majority of us, and that innocent people are being killed every day. We are blind to the lives we are destroying in this country and others. We are so caught up in whatever Trump is doing we don't realize that there are systematic problems our representatives avoid fixing like solutions are a plague. I think that there are many things wrong with this country, far beyond nepotism and narcissism. One of them is our inability as a society to hold all folks accountable.

Trump is not an idiot. He is an entitled man who was born into wealth and fortune. He is a predatory man that has had to do little by himself for his entire existence. I think he is a puppet, being moved by much more malicious hands than his own.

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