Sidenote: This story and its characters are fictional and are of my own creation. However, the ideas/opinions echoed in this piece are mine.
“Let’s go see this Movie Michael!” my friend Alicia said to me. It was a hit LGBT movie she wanted me to see, and it just came out of theaters yesterday, and all my friends want to go. Despite noticing the lack of color in this “groundbreaking” LGBT movie, I told them, yes, and on Saturday night, we went.
As my friends and I walked into the movie theater with our arms loaded with large bowls filled with popcorn and too much butter, I looked at the audience. I almost never felt so alone as I saw that the audience reflected the “diversity” of the movie, one could say I was the darkest in the room. However, I brushed this off and sat down in my seat, preparing myself for this “groundbreaking” movie.
2 ½ hours later, my friends and I walked out of the theater, and into the diner across the street. Let’s just say that I was the only person who didn’t need tissue that night; my 4 friends needed at least 5 boxes.
“I just can’t believe how Brad broke up with Jack because Jack didn’t want to move away from Topeka,” Alicia said. “I mean, why couldn’t Brad have just stayed in Topeka with Jack? Sure, Jack’s mom and dad weren’t exactly happy about the idea of gay marriage, but in the end, they accepted it."
“Alicia, you have to understand, Brad had bigger dreams than Topeka couldn’t hold. And if Jack couldn’t accept that, then Brad and Jack were not meant to be together” Samantha replied. “Well no matter what, I loved how the movie represented the LGBT community so well. It shows to the heteronormative world that the LGBT community grapples with the same problems as they do” Carried stated. “Michael, you’ve been oddly quiet, what did you think of the movie” Alicia asked.
“I found the writing was great and the actors played their parts well, but I honestly felt no connection at all to the story. I felt as if I was watching a TV show that had great actors, but had little connection with its audience” I said hesitantly. The table became quiet as my friends stared at me in shock.
“But, how could you not connect to the movie since you like guys too? Out of the four of us, you should have found the story the most relatable. Literally, it was about two guys falling in love, and then breaking up because of relationship issues” Carrie replied.
“Well, because their story of growing up in Kansas and being accepted by their friends and families doesn’t reflect all the experiences LGBTQ people have had, especially for people of color” I declared. “Well at least you’re being represented on screen,” Samantha remarked.
“Excuse me,” I said, turning to her in disbelief. “I said at least the media is giving you all more representation. Honestly, it was a great movie, but you had to get all technical with this ‘there’s not enough diversity’ stuff. Hey, at least you weren’t born in the 50s” Samantha stated.
“Well in certain parts of the country, we are treated as if it was the 50s. You know Samantha, I don’t believe you have any idea what rejection by your parents feels like. To be pushed out onto the street for your sexuality alone, kicked out into the cold and dark streets. When the crime rate on people like me is higher than people like you, then we both know that there is a problem. And you know what, the media does not show enough representation of the LGBTQ community because it doesn’t show our side, what the LGBTQ people of color experience. Not only do we have to deal with the rejection of our religious relatives, we also have to deal with racial stereotypes, cultural expectations, and harmful racism in our own communities. And these painful and excruciating experiences barely shown through the media. You know, instead of making movies where white males play the lead gay character, how about a Latino, Black, or Asian one for a change? If I finally see that on the screen, just as I saw in “Moonlight”, then yes, I could potentially connect to the movie in front of me. But when the media does not produce movies that justly have PoC’s playing lead roles in LGBTQ films, then forever our experiences will be buried and coated with one, large, white painted brush”.
I got up and left the restaurant after that leaving money on the table.
I could hardly breathe as I walked away from the restaurant in anger. No one understood my experiences facing violence because of my sexuality and my skin color.
A couple of blocks later, I stopped and sat down on a bench, taking a rest, and watching the people around me. As I observed my surroundings while sitting in Southern Harlem, in a far gaze I saw two men, one Brown and one Black walking down the street, smiling at each other. Perplexed, and filled with curiosity, I stared at them, bravely holding hands at 10 pm in Harlem.
They just both looked forward, happy, and filled with life, despite the world around them aching to tear them apart. I suddenly felt a tear fall into my palm, I finally felt a connection. After seeing this sign from God, I got up, and walked north, further into Harlem, and back to my small apartment, where I could hear the wailing of nearby children, and the screaming of my neighbors. But for the first time, I looked ahead, with optimism.
Further Readings on Violence against LGBTQ PoC and LGBTQ Media Representation:
https://www.nytimes.com/interactive/2016/06/16/us/...
http://www.latimes.com/entertainment/movies/la-et-...