7 Thing I've Learned While Planning A Wedding

7 Thing I've Learned While Planning A Wedding

Getting married is the happiest time of your life, not the most stressful.
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Planning a wedding is hard work. There are so many details that you never would have thought of and being the bride, you have the final say. I was crazy enough and had to plan a wedding during a semester of college, across the country from where we are actually getting married. Thank goodness for my amazing mom who has done so much. Throughout the process, I’ve learned some things. I’ve narrowed it down to seven pieces of advice for all of those future brides out there.

1. Take a deep breath

Being overwhelmed comes with the territory of being a bride, but the most important thing I’ve learned is to take a deep breath. Everything is going to work out and there is no reason to stress over every detail. Put down whatever you’re working on and relax for a minute. If you’re really stressed out, put the wedding plans away and go do something else. Marriage is supposed to be exciting, not a chore.

2. Have a planner

I would have lost my mind without my planner. I had a to do list each week with a couple wedding tasks to get done in that week. Looking at plans week-by-week, instead of the whole process, really helped me keep my sanity.

3. Let people help you

I’ve learned over the past couple of months that I’m very independent and like to think that I can do everything myself. Unfortunately, that’s not true. There are so many people who are willing to help you, so delegate the work! There’s no need to stress over everything when there are so many people who want to help.

4. Write it down

If you don’t write it down, you will forget. I’m always thinking about different wedding ideas and details that if I don’t write down a great idea, I will forget about it. This goes back to the idea of having a planner. If you write it down, it will get done. If you don’t, the task will get lost in the black hole that is my mind.

5. Don’t take the stress out on other people (especially your fiancé)

Wedding planning can get stressful, especially if things aren’t going the way you would like them to. The most important thing is to not take your stress out on people. They haven’t done anything wrong. With this, don’t take your stress on your fiancé either. They love you so much and they don’t deserve that. Take a deep breath and relax before hanging out with other people when feeling stressed.

6. No one is perfect

In my mind, there will be a perfect wedding, with a perfect cake and a perfect dress. Obviously, there is no such thing as perfect; especially when working with other people, who aren’t perfect either. Things will fall apart and something could go wrong with wedding planning. It’s important to remember that no one is perfect, and that’s okay!

7. You will live happily ever after

At the end of the day, the wedding will be amazing. I will get to marry the love of my life and we will spend forever together! How incredible is that?! It doesn’t matter if the little details aren’t exactly how you imagine. The love between you and your spouse will be so strong that the day will be amazing no matter what.

Cover Image Credit: Pixabay

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I Ghosted My Old Self For 5 Months In An Effort To Reevaluate My Life

My life fell apart faster than a drunk dude approaching a Jenga stack.

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BREAKING (not fake) NEWS: It's true, you have to hit your lowest before hitting your highest.

I want to share my lowest with you, and I'm almost ashamed to say it had nothing to do with the loss of both of my parents. I like to think I handled that like a warrior.

Turns out I didn't, and the hurt I've been burying from that hit me all at once, the same moment my life fell apart faster than a drunk dude approaching a Jenga stack.

My life flipped upside down overnight back in August. I had my heart broken shattered, lost two very important friendships that I thought were with me until the end, lost my 9-5 job, my health took a hit stronger than a boulder, and I was absolutely lost. For the first time, ever, I let go of the reigns on my own life. I had no idea how to handle myself, how to make anyone around me happy, how to get out of bed or how to even begin the process of trying to process what the f*ck just happened. I was terrified.

Coming from the girl who never encountered a dilemma she couldn't fix instantaneously, on her own, with no emotional burden. I was checked out from making my life better. So I didn't try. I didn't even think about thinking about trying.

The only relatively understandable way I could think to deal with anything was to not deal with anything. And that's exactly what I did. And it was f*cking amazing.

I went into hiding for a week, then went on a week getaway with my family, regained that feeling of being loved unconditionally, and realized that's all I need. They are all I need. Friends? Nah. Family. Only. Always.

On that vacation, I got a call from the school district that they wanted me in for an interview the day I come home. It was for a position that entailed every single class, combined, that I took in my college career. It was a career that I had just gotten my degree for three months before.

I came home and saw my doctor and got a health plan in order. I was immediately thrown into the month-long hiring process for work. I made it a point to make sunset every single night, alone, to make sure I was mentally caught up and in-check at the same exact speed that my life was turning. I was not about to lose my control again. Not ever.

Since August, I have spent more time with family than ever. I've read over 10 new books, I've discovered so much new music, I went on some of my best, the worst and funniest first dates, I made true, loyal friends that cause me zero stress while completely drowning me in overwhelming amounts of love and support, I got back into yoga, and I started that job and damn near fell more in love with it than I ever was for the guy I lost over the summer.

But most importantly, I changed my mindset. I promised myself to not say a single sentence that has a negative tone to it. I promised myself to think three times before engaging in any type of personal conversation. I promised myself to wake up in a good mood every damn day because I'm alive and that is the only factor I should need to be happy.

Take it from a girl who knew her words were weapons and used them frequently before deciding to turn every aspect of her life into positivity — even in the midst of losing one of my closest family members. I have been told multiple times, by people so dear to me that I'm "glowing." You know what I said back? F*ck yes I am, and I deserve to.

I am so happy with myself and it has nothing to do with the things around me. It's so much deeper than that, and I'm beaming with pride. Of myself. For myself.

I want to leave you with these thoughts that those people who have hurt me, left me, and loved me through these last couple of months have taught me

Growth is sometimes a lonely process.
Some things go too deep to ever be forgotten.
You need to give yourself the permission to be happy right now.
You outgrow people you thought you couldn't live without, and you're not the one to blame for that. You're growing.
Sometimes it takes your break down to reach your breakthrough.

Life isn't fair, but it's still good.

My god, it's so f*cking good.

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6 Things I'm Attempting To Incorporate Into My Life In 2019

The key word here is "attempting" ... nobody's perfect!

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Overall, 2018 was a successful year full of growth and maturity, and I have high hopes for the next 12 months. Instead of trying to top 2018 with some irrational, cliché, and overdone resolutions that will inevitably fall through the cracks of my busy schedule, however, I've decided to simply attempt to be mindful of a few things in 2019 that, if continuously conscious of, will most likely result in a successful trip around the sun.

1. Mental Health Matters! 

Throughout the past few months this fact has made itself more clear in my life, as I have experienced what it's like to have a not-so-healthy mental state. It's extremely important to find the time to give your mind the rest, peace, and therapy it needs in order to be successful in the rest of your endeavors. My goal, as I'm sure is everyone's goal, is to be happy. I firmly believe happiness stems from a healthy mindset. So, I'm dedicating 2019 to finding ways to feed and protect that healthy mindset.

2. The Goal Is Happiness! 

Like I said, happiness is usually what everyone is striving for, but it tends to be sacrificed and pushed aside. So in 2019, I'm saying if it doesn't make me happy, then it's not worth it! Basically for me, this just translates into making sure I don't stress over the little things, working on my positivity, and spreading more kindness than anything else!

3. Use Your Voice!

It is a rare occasion when I voice my discomfort or anxieties to people other than my close friends and family. This year, I'm working on using my voice to get me to where I want, and need, to be! Gone are the days where I'm too shy and nervous to voice my opinions and ask questions.

4. Surround Yourself With Good People! 

2017 and 2018 were the years where I found my truest and dearest friends. I not only learned what a true friend is, but I was also challenged in my loyalty and ability to reciprocate the love my friends have shown me. Because of this, I'm doing the best I can to make sure I don't lose the strong friendships I've made, and also to be open to the endless possibilities of friendships that exist outside the walls of my comfort zone.

5. Technology Detox!

After a challenging assignment requiring me to attempt a 24-hour electronic media fast, I realized how attached I am to my electronics. Though a lot of this attachment is required solely based upon the age and technological scene we live in, I'm striving towards lessening my electronic usage in order to connect more with the social world, rather than the "social media" world.

6. Early Bird Gets the Worm! 

This one may sound silly, but will undoubtedly pose a tedious challenge to my life. I love my sleep, and this winter break has shown me that my love for my bed can sometimes trump any other activities I have planned for the day. My goal for 2019 is to become a morning-ish person. Getting out of bed can be the hardest part of my day, so this year I'd like to have my cup of coffee in hand before 9 o'clock (except on weekends, of course!).

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