It all began February 21st, 2017 - around 2pm. 
It was a (normal) Tuesday. 

I can recount what homework I was working on and tell you my outfit.

My memory is sharp. When it is turned on.

*turned on* is the key word to note here.

But when it turns off... it's like a fog no one can snap me out of. No one - but ME.

Slowly- over the past year my brain had made its own ~invisible~ code to alert the ones closest in my life for when I was OK or when I LITERALLY needed to be carried HOME because my legs were about to give out.

**Back to 2/21/17**-- talking like normal & then THE fall happens:

I vividly recall falling too quick for someone to catch me. I was sitting sideways on my desk chair, and the next thing I know I'm lying head first on the ground. There I was- - helplessly FROZEN in time- - like everything around me stopped, and I just couldn't breath.

ONE WHOLE YEAR HAS NOW PASSED: It is Fall Semester of 2017...

I am FINE. I am OK. Just let me run. I need to breathe.

"I promise I won't be stressed if we leave lib soon plz. I need my hat too before we go to gym. don't let me forget!!!" - me
"NO, SG- you just need sleep; you're TOO stressed."- friends

"NO- I need to run. That's all I need to breathe again."

The saying "it comes in waves" is the easiest way anyone with brain traumas can describe their reasoning for everything. Sometimes, all is right, and sometimes all is broken.

Moral of the story: Get a second opinion before resuming to normal activities after a concussion!

To most, I'm just a weird runner - to others, I'm a crazy photographer.

Those who know me best remember that I too used to be a dancer. I used to be an artist, I used to play soccer, and I even used to love classical music.

Thanks to my "team" who knows that, sometimes, running is the only *feeling* that keeps me strong when the lines start to blur, and I can't *feel* at all.

While I still have a LONG road ahead before I can imagine that first jump back on the track- for now, I will keep lacing up my beloved Nike Vomeros day-after-day.

Pretending I'm back. Gearing up for a state meet or the Junior Olympics is enough to keep me strong for now. Maybe one day I'll even race in neon track spikes again.

Yes - it's easy to get frustrated, but it's the little things that keep us all going. Whether it's a flat track, digital camera or keys on a baby grande....

HOME is never one place. HOME is the people that pick you up when you worked your heart too hard and you need a pick-me-up, in order to "FEEL AGAIN."

Forget the legs- they'll be back tomorrow.

Feeling my way through the darkness
Guided by a beating heart
I can't tell where the journey will end, but I know where to start.

They tell me I'm too young to understand- they say I'm caught up in a dream. But life will pass me by if I don't open up my eyes- well that's FINE by ME.So, wake me up when it's all over. When I'm wiser and I'm older.

All this time I was finding myselfAnd I didn't know I was lost.
-"Wake Me Up" by Avicii

"For we walk by faith, not by sight."

xo-- poSitiviG