I Am The Girl Who Is Oxymoron, And I Won't Change That
Start writing a post
Entertainment

I Am The Girl Who Is Oxymoron, And I Won't Change That

A piece modeled after a get-to-know-me college essay application.

225
I Am The Girl Who Is Oxymoron, And I Won't Change That
Sara Vargas

I am an oxymoron: a new classic, a silent scream, a just war.

I am often seen and never seen running through the jungle and jumping over rivers.

I have been known to write full-length novels over my lunch breaks, all about my experiences in different dimensions.

I research psychological behavior of autistic students, I write award-winning folk ballads, I rock and I roll.

Occasionally, I run for five hours in a row.

I woo men with my sensuous and godlike obsession with the human brain, I can tie thirty different types of knots, and I cook twenty-five-minute rice in twenty minutes.

I am an expert in tree-branch photography, a veteran in love, and an outlaw in Colombia.

Using only an empty paper-towel roll, and plastic canvas box, I once single-handedly created a high-end bunk-bed.

I once saved the life of a three-legged turtle, started my own dog-walking business, and used all its earnings on treats for my clients.

I can play a 12 string guitar, I was scouted by backstage.com, I am the subject of numerous articles, and I once sent a letter to The Cheetah Girls requesting an audition - I may or may not have received a letter back.

When I’m bored, I watch Swan Lake on repeat or I learn how to play Moonlight Sonata on the piano by ear.

I enjoy dancing to the Backstreet Boys with my golden retriever.

I occasionally draw millions of flowers in the corners of my homework assignments, and I often fidget.

On Wednesdays after school, I tutor a Bangladeshi student and use my earnings to educate a child in India.

I am an articulate artist, a passionate analyst, and a ruthless debater.

Critics worldwide swoon over my original line of greeting cards.

Once, I was almost abducted by a blue-eyed Cuban.

I don’t limit myself, and when I do it’s with portions of my homemade lemon zested cake.

I have performed spoken word poetry

I invested in a startup company committed to shapes.

I performed CPR on a bumble bee.

I can survive in the wilderness for 30 days with only a bow and an arrow.

I commit myself to ending child trafficking in India - through providing a place for children to learn.

I dream of traveling the world, ending child violence, spreading healing through music.

I once slept on a pile of books to prove a point.

I have read the entire Magic Treehouse series.

I once read When Breath Becomes Air, Gifted Hands, and The Chronicles of Narnia in one day and still had time to construct an Ikea desk.

I once gave bread to a homeless man - who ended up yelling at me screaming, "I AM NOT A DUCK".

Once I have almost had an arranged marriage to a hotel manager’s son.

My greatest fear is Antarctica, but my “run a marathon on seven continents” dream requires me to face my fear.

While on vacation in Oceanside, I successfully negotiated a $25 necklace down to $9.

I once adopted a puppy from a homeless shelter.

I once broke a “first timers” archery record and was gifted a special pen and signed dart board for my achievement.

I once donated half of my closet to a child with no clothes.

Once my French teacher asked me to come and live in her house.

Once I was a cleaning lady’s assistant.

The first meal I learned to make was a cheese sandwich.

I used to believe that washing dishes was a hobby.

I sleep once a week; when I do sleep, I sleep with a bag of frozen green beans on my shins.

I act, I sing, I science, and my bills are all paid.

On weekends, to let off steam, I sing to old people and pour hot chocolate into styrofoam cups.

Years ago I found the answer to world peace but forgot to write it down.

On birthdays, I ask for skills, like the opportunity to learn the violin.

I breed prize-winning peas.

I believe in the power of the human mind.

I believe that my purpose extends beyond a doctorate degree,

and,

I believe that college will allow me to find the intersection between neuroscience and freedom.

This is who I am.

Report this Content
This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
Student Life

Waitlisted for a College Class? Here's What to Do!

Dealing with the inevitable realities of college life.

48681
college students waiting in a long line in the hallway
StableDiffusion

Course registration at college can be a big hassle and is almost never talked about. Classes you want to take fill up before you get a chance to register. You might change your mind about a class you want to take and must struggle to find another class to fit in the same time period. You also have to make sure no classes clash by time. Like I said, it's a big hassle.

This semester, I was waitlisted for two classes. Most people in this situation, especially first years, freak out because they don't know what to do. Here is what you should do when this happens.

Keep Reading...Show less
a man and a woman sitting on the beach in front of the sunset

Whether you met your new love interest online, through mutual friends, or another way entirely, you'll definitely want to know what you're getting into. I mean, really, what's the point in entering a relationship with someone if you don't know whether or not you're compatible on a very basic level?

Consider these 21 questions to ask in the talking stage when getting to know that new guy or girl you just started talking to:

Keep Reading...Show less
Lifestyle

Challah vs. Easter Bread: A Delicious Dilemma

Is there really such a difference in Challah bread or Easter Bread?

30958
loaves of challah and easter bread stacked up aside each other, an abundance of food in baskets
StableDiffusion

Ever since I could remember, it was a treat to receive Easter Bread made by my grandmother. We would only have it once a year and the wait was excruciating. Now that my grandmother has gotten older, she has stopped baking a lot of her recipes that require a lot of hand usage--her traditional Italian baking means no machines. So for the past few years, I have missed enjoying my Easter Bread.

Keep Reading...Show less
Adulting

Unlocking Lake People's Secrets: 15 Must-Knows!

There's no other place you'd rather be in the summer.

954794
Group of joyful friends sitting in a boat
Haley Harvey

The people that spend their summers at the lake are a unique group of people.

Whether you grew up going to the lake, have only recently started going, or have only been once or twice, you know it takes a certain kind of person to be a lake person. To the long-time lake people, the lake holds a special place in your heart, no matter how dirty the water may look.

Keep Reading...Show less
Student Life

Top 10 Reasons My School Rocks!

Why I Chose a Small School Over a Big University.

179704
man in black long sleeve shirt and black pants walking on white concrete pathway

I was asked so many times why I wanted to go to a small school when a big university is so much better. Don't get me wrong, I'm sure a big university is great but I absolutely love going to a small school. I know that I miss out on big sporting events and having people actually know where it is. I can't even count how many times I've been asked where it is and I know they won't know so I just say "somewhere in the middle of Wisconsin." But, I get to know most people at my school and I know my professors very well. Not to mention, being able to walk to the other side of campus in 5 minutes at a casual walking pace. I am so happy I made the decision to go to school where I did. I love my school and these are just a few reasons why.

Keep Reading...Show less

Subscribe to Our Newsletter

Facebook Comments