Curled up in a blanket burrito, ignoring all the texts on my phone and sniffling while an upbeat pop song signals the end of another mediocre rom-com playing on a loop, a thought strikes me suddenly—why can't life be like that?

Certainly, that would just make life easier. You'd never have to deal with all the gross little things boys do—like blow their noses or fart or snore. The worst crime a boy is guilty of in a romantic-comedy is "being afraid of commitment" which is easily fixed after an hour and a half.

Prince Charming is always the most handsome guy on the screen and beloved by all. He's clever, sometimes sarcastic, and never annoying. When you put it like that, it makes every other guy you've ever met in real life pale in comparison and seem like a giant waste of time.

Too bad that fairy-tale romance doesn't exist. But no one ever told us that.

How many relationships have you ended thinking that you deserved better? That the person before you wasn't up to your level and that your match was still out there somewhere? How long have you waited for a grand romantic gesture (kissing in the rain, driving hours just to see you) instead of just a measly text asking "Wyd"? How many times have your partners disappointed you for reasons you can't even explain to yourself?

Romantic comedies have morphed our ideals of romance and relationships into something so grandiose and far-fetched that it cannot possibly exist in our time.

Blurring the lines between fairy-tale romance and reality could result in irreparable damage, especially when it concerns our relationships.

Yet we remain fixated on this notion that a man will come and sweep us off our feet and do everything absolutely right— and even if he messes up along the way, he does it with flair. What this actually does is create distance between you and your partner as you hold them up to expectations that are simply impossible to meet; this results in frustration for you that you inevitably take out on your significant other and confusion and implacable guilt for your partner for not being able to satisfy you.

See also: Rom Coms Only Set People Up For Unrealistic Expectations About Love

Yes, boys are usually pretty frustrating or disappointing. There have definitely been times where I looked at my boyfriend and thought to myself, "He can't possibly be that clueless... Can he?"

And the answer is always... yes. He is that clueless, ladies. Men don't operate on subtleties and implications the way women do. What seems rather obvious to us is a masterfully coded riddle for him. And it's not his fault—from birth, parents usually end up talking to baby girls much more than baby boys, resulting in an improved sense of verbal expression, and usually, heightened emotional intelligence.

Stop blaming your man for things he doesn't even know he's doing incorrectly. Sorry to break it to you, but he can never be Ryan Gosling, no matter how much you want him to be. Instead, focus on improving your relationship by communicating more effectively what you want and what you (reasonably) expect from him.

No, he probably won't hold up a jukebox playing love songs outside your window the next time the two of you get into a fight, but if you explain to him that you would like to be pampered every now and then, you might be pleasantly surprised. Clearly expressing what you want out of a relationship will do wonders for both you and him and eradicate unnecessary tension and drama.