Ring By Spring? Not For Me

Ring By Spring? Not For Me

*Opens Facebook* *Sees engagement announcement*
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What’s that old saying? “Always the bridesmaid but never the bride” or something along those lines.

Yeah. That’s my entire mood when I open Facebook or Instagram and scroll just to see post after post about another couple putting a ring on it.

Last week, as I sat in my bed with my bowl of pasta, I opened my laptop to check social media. What I saw came as a surprise but honestly, in hindsight, I saw it coming. I saw four separate couples post pictures with captions like “I said yes” or “so excited to marry my best friend!” And then the picture would be of them looking in love with the lucky girl proudly throwing her hand into the camera to show off her fancy, new rock. Scroll a bit more to see the 276 reactions the picture got and the 74 comments of people congratulating the couple. The point is, the older I get, the more engagement announcements I’m beginning to see.

I think this a sure sign that I’m officially an adult and that I’m only going to get older. Soon enough, the wedding album will drop on Facebook and then there will be baby announcements. Honestly, if I had a dollar for every engagement announcement that I saw in the past year and a half, I’d have enough money to pay for a month’s worth of rent.

If I learned anything after turning 20 it’s this: once you hit your 20s, start expecting your peers and friends to find a person, date them and then get engaged. It moves kind of quickly, to be perfectly frank. I saw one guy post their engagement to his girlfriend and all I could think of was, “dang...this kid who stuck a crayon up his nose is getting MARRIED?!”

Sometimes I feel like maybe I’m not doing something right. A lot of my friends are in serious relationships and will also probably be tying the knot in the next three years. Me? I’ve been single for four years and honestly, I’m just trying to graduate college on time! The more people who got into relationships, the more I felt that maybe I’m just not datable. After all, no guys would ever try to flirt with me when I went out. They would all be more interested in my friends. But then again, I never been one to really go out of my way to flirt with a guy when I was out with friends.

At first, I was a bit bitter towards the couples that would get engaged young. Why would you go and try to rush when you have your whole life to live?? But now I understand that sometimes you just know that you found your person and that you just want to start your lives together as soon as possible. I hope that one day that I’ll be able to find someone that I can take a picture with to post on every form of social media, announcing that I, too, have found my person.

Cover Image Credit: Shawn Brandow / Flickr

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The Truth About Young Marriage

Different doesn't mean wrong.
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When I was a kid, I had an exact picture in my mind of what my life was going to look like. I was definitely not the kind of girl who would get married young, before the age of 25, at least.

And let me tell you, I was just as judgmental as that sentence sounds.

I could not wrap my head around people making life-long commitments before they even had an established life. It’s not my fault that I thought this way, because the majority opinion about young marriage in today’s society is not a supportive one. Over the years, it has become the norm to put off marriage until you have an education and an established career. Basically, this means you put off marriage until you learn how to be an adult, instead of using marriage as a foundation to launch into adulthood.

When young couples get married, people will assume that you are having a baby, and they will say that you’re throwing your life away — it’s inevitable.

It’s safe to say that my perspective changed once I signed my marriage certificate at the age of 18. Although marriage is not always easy and getting married at such a young age definitely sets you up for some extra challenges, there is something to be said about entering into marriage and adulthood at the same time.

SEE ALSO: Finding A Husband In College

Getting married young does not mean giving up your dreams. It means having someone dream your dreams with you. When you get lost along the way, and your dreams and goals seem out of reach, it’s having someone there to point you in the right direction and show you the way back. Despite what people are going to tell you, it definitely doesn’t mean that you are going to miss out on all the experiences life has to offer. It simply means that you get to share all of these great adventures with the person you love most in the world.

And trust me, there is nothing better than that. It doesn’t mean that you are already grown up, it means that you have someone to grow with.

You have someone to stick with you through anything from college classes and changing bodies to negative bank account balances.

You have someone to sit on your used furniture with and talk about what you want to do and who you want to be someday.

Then, when someday comes, you get to look back on all of that and realize what a blessing it is to watch someone grow. Even after just one year of marriage, I look back and I am incredibly proud of my husband. I’m proud of the person he has become, and I’m proud of what we have accomplished together. I can’t wait to see what the rest of our lives have in store for us.

“You can drive at 16, go to war at 18, drink at 21, and retire at 65. So who can say what age you have to be to find your one true love?" — One Tree Hill
Cover Image Credit: Sara Donnelli Photography

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To The High School Senior Wishing She Could Fast-Forward To Graduation, Careful What You Wish For

Don't wish this time away.

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As the last stretch of my freshman year of college stands before me, I've been thinking a lot about where I was a year ago today. I've thought about how fast the time has gone, but also how much has happened in that year.

A year ago, I decided what college I was going to and was getting ready to graduate, and honestly counting down the days until graduation. Senior year was almost over, and I couldn't wait to walk across that stage, get my diploma, and FINALLY get to start my real life. However, now that it's a year later I honestly barely remember all those little moments and it feels like literally a world ago when I was in my high school and making my Senior Board full of pictures of my childhood. And part of me wishes that I hadn't wished all that time away.

So, to my high school seniors out there — I encourage you to cherish all the memories you are making. I encourage you to spend time with your parents and savor the meals you have with them and enjoy the conversations where your mom asks all the mom questions about your day, and your dad tells a story from his childhood that you've heard a million times before. I encourage you to appreciate the friends you have, and whether or not you plan to stay friends with them after graduation, be grateful for the time with them in this season and the role that they played in your life.

I ask you to look around your high school, stop and stare at the walls that you've probably been praying to get out of for a few months now and appreciate the memories and times you've had in those buildings. Whether or not high school was a great time for you or a bad time, it was a time of growth and the place where you matured and made mistakes and succeeded.

Seniors, enjoy these last few months because before you know it you'll blink and it will be a year later and you'll be miss those days that you complained about, those teachers you rolled your eyes at, and those friends that you shared that time with.

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