Too often we are damaged by irrelevant people. I assume the argument that you’ll make next is how irrelevant can these people really be if they are to invoke any measure of significant pain within us?

As you reflect on a time that you have been hurt. A time that a person who you believed to be entirely different in heart and in spirit, far more beautiful and rich in soul and mind caused you pain. When you look up from the pit you were dropped in to see them holding your heart, still beating, still you, in the palm of their hand. You play a starring role in their puppet show and fall victim to their games. You bend over backwards and lose your mind to hear that “yes” they really are sorry but you recognize the feigned mercy, see your heart break, reflected in their eyes.

A person’s relevance, most unfortunately, is based entirely on who you are and who you believe you need to find peace with that self image. You comb through missing pieces of your identity, lost along the way to the present. You fill in the gaps with someone whom you believe to be a better part of you. You settle because you are, by nature, an impatient person, a lonely soul, and an incandescently beautiful innocent. You base a person’s relevance off of how you see yourself with them. Do they hold your hand through the hurt and kiss away your tears just to taste your pain and feel with you? Or are they the reason your tears fall so fast and full and sure? Certainly these people have the highest relevance, inarguably these people are of the highest position on the hierarchy we have created, that we assume is irrefutable.

Where the error lies in this, is when we make the mistake of assuming that the citizens of our hearts are not beings of transience. We assume those people of relevance are there to stay. People change and change other people and people bleed and cry and make other people cry and bleed and people feel and make other people feel everything and feel nothing all at the same time. We often ignore the power we have over others. Those people who mean the most can sometimes mean the least in times of hurt, and in some time can mean nothing at all. The terrifyingly beautiful fact of all this is that those who once held onto you by strings and decided to cut one string at a time or sever all at once, cleanly and swiftly. Those people and their strings no longer hold your weight. You are no longer their worry, their victim, their mess to cause and ignore. You will find the power that was held away from you. They have met their oblivion, lost their relevance. You will find your lost pieces and your light will shine on someone who has been looking for theirs. And those of irrelevance will find someone else who fits their strings more willingly than you ever did.