14 Relationship Deal Breakers That Should Warn You Not To Even Give Them A Second Date

14 Relationship Deal Breakers That Should Warn You Not To Even Give Them A Second Date

Because some sh*t is just unacceptable.

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Being open-minded is great when it comes to relationships. I fully endorse the idea of dating different people from different backgrounds to expand your own views, but there are some things you just have to say no to. Here are 14 deal-breakers that I think everyone should set.

1. Having absolutely nothing in common

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We're off to a pretty obvious start here. It's always nice to date someone a little different than you to broaden your own horizons. But that doesn't necessarily mean dating your complete opposite is the best idea. If you find yourselves not being able to connect on anything, it might not be meant to be.

2. Constantly talking over or interrupting you

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Sure, everyone does this from time to time. But if your partner consistently talks over you and doesn't let you speak your own mind, they may view what they are saying as more important than something you have to say.

3. Jealousy/possessiveness

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Everyone can get jealous at times— it's just a part of human nature. But if they are sneaking onto your phone to look through your text messages and telling you not to talk to certain people, it's a really good sign that they don't really trust you.

4. No ambition

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Now, I'm not saying they need to want to be the next president or anything. But having some sort of life goal is important. Maybe they are training to one day run a marathon or they are in college studying to get a certain degree. It doesn't need to be anything to far into the future, but they should have plans other than just to lie around for the rest of their life.

5. Distance in the physical sense

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Distance is something that can kill any relationship. Especially if it's a relatively new relationship, most people want someone who is not too far away to snuggle with.

6. Different paths

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If you both have completely different outlooks on what you want your futures to look like, they may not be your perfect match. Compromise can always come into play, but if they picture having 8 kids with a big house and you want to live in a small apartment in the city, then it may get difficult to agree.

7. Temper

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One of the biggest deal-breakers everyone and their mother should have is extreme anger issues. Everyone gets a little bit upset from time to time, but if they ever take their anger out on you in any way, run for the hills and never look back.

8. Social media/technology habits

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Most young people in today's age have a smartphone in their hand for the majority of the day. Which is completely fine, unless your new S.O. is constantly not responding to you and never showing you off on their Instagram or Snapchat. If you're constantly texting them throughout your day and they take five hours to respond, well...there may be a problem.

9. Hung up on an ex

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Don't get me wrong here— I'm all for remaining friends with exes. But if they are constantly bringing them up in conversation, talking them up or slamming them down, then it may be a bad sign. Also, remember if they constantly talk badly about their exes, that probably means they'll do the same to you once you're over.

10. Religious/political views

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Political parties are at each other's throats. Maybe if you're super open-minded, you can make this work. But if you constantly go back to fighting over politics or religious beliefs, it may be time to call it off.

11. Seeing the other as a project

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Sure, as you progress in a relationship you may find some unfavorable traits of theirs. But it's never a good sign if you are starting out a relationship with a list of things that you want to 'fix.' They're a person, not a project, after all.

12. Alcohol/drug problem

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If you like to enjoy a drink or two every once in a while, but they are going out and getting wasted more then you're comfortable with, then things may just not work out for the best.

13. Social tendencies

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There's nothing wrong with being an introvert or an extrovert, but dating someone who would rather stay in on a Friday night while you want to go out and hit up the clubs may be a struggle.

14. General inability to work together

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If you find yourselves arguing more often than not and constantly at each other's throats, then it's probably a pretty strong sign that you two just aren't right for each other.

Overall, if your partner has one or two of these things, then you may be able to still work it out. Maybe your relationship is so strong that it can transcend past all of these things, and if so, then a huge stadium-filled applause to you.

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Plan These 13 Dates For Your Girlfriend This Fall And Thank Me Later

Listen up, guys.

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If you are a boy and you are reading this, plan one of these dates and you'll make your girlfriend the happiest person alive. Yeah, you can thank me later.

1. Go to a pumpkin patch.

This may be super basic but who doesn't want a cute little pumpkin around Halloween time. Usually, you will take a hayride to the pumpkin patch which is always a nice time to spend together. It will also be really cute seeing how excited she gets over finding the perfect little pumpkin.

2. Go on a hayride.

If you go to a pumpkin patch you may have the opportunity to go on a hayride and you definitely should! You will get to see all around the farm and the scenery is usually beautiful in the fall with the leaves changing colors!

3. Go apple picking.

This date will always allow for a cute photo shoot opportunity and everyone will be able to see your Insta post later captioned "the apple of my eye." Also, if you love apples what better place to get them then a local farm where you pick them yourself! Make sure you check your local farm to see when your favorite apples will be ready for harvest!

4. Bake something together.

There are so many amazing recipes for fall, apple pie being one of them. Which will be the perfect thing to bake with your S.O. after apple picking (two dates in one)!

5. Go to a local festival.

No matter where you are from there are probably a ton of local festivals around you throughout the fall. Whether it is a food festival, fall fest, music festival or even a lantern festival all of them are usually a perfect date. You can experience new things together and enjoy the fall weather.

6. Go to a football game.

Whether it is high school, college, or a professional football game any football is good football in the fall. Between a fun tailgate and an exciting game, if you are into sports football is the way to go.

7. Walk or hike around a state park.

No matter where you are from there are always state parks around you! Fall is the perfect time to go on an outdoor because it's not too hot to too cold. The scenery is always beautiful with all of the leaves changing colors. If there is a lake you could always go kayaking or paddle boating!

8. Visit your local farm.

A lot of local farms have fresh veggies, apples, baked goods and of course pumpkins! Also, check and see if your local farm has any fall family days. On those days they usually have a lot of fun activities, animals, hayrides, corn mazes, pumpkins and if you're lucky they'll have amazing apple cider donuts!

9. Stay in for a cozy movie day.

With Freeform starting their 31 days of Halloween this leads to the perfect excuse for a night on the couch. Pick out your favorite Halloween movie, make some popcorn and have some warm apple cider while cuddling up on the couch.

10. Visit a haunted house.

If you are down for something a little scarier then a Halloween movie, check out a haunted house near yours. It could even be a haunted hayride or haunted corn maze.

11. Take her out to breakfast.

Girls are always down for a cute breakfast date. Especially when you can roll out of beds in your sweats and keep them on in the cozy fall weather.

12. Spend a night carving pumpkins.

Once Halloween rolls around you should grab a cheap carving supplies kit, roll up your sleeves, and carve a cute pumpkin together. Whether you write your initials or create a jack-o-lantern it will probably be full of fun memories of pulling out pumpkin guts.

13. Go to a Halloween party.

Take some time and hit up Pinterest for a super cute couples costume and eat all the candy you possibly can!

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True Love From The Perspective Of A Cynic

What if marriage isn't my biggest dream?

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I've always believed in true love. I've always believed that, someday, I am required to find a person who I want to spend the rest of my life with. Someone who I would love and cherish for the rest of my life. Recently, however, I think I've noticed that my view of true love is way romanticized.

From the time we are born, we are constantly told that it is our goal in life to find a partner; that our biggest dream should be to settle down, get married, and have kids. This, however, has led to an unshakeable idea that, unless you are married by a certain age, you are broken. And if you decide that you don't want this particular dream, they say there is something inherently wrong with you. If you choose a career over kids, they say you don't have your priorities straight.

The problem with this is that it is not everyone's dream to settle down. There is so much hate towards those who choose the single life, or those who decide that their career is their bigger priority. We look down on people who are okay with being single. They don't want to get married, so they must be crazy, right?

This can be seen in media everywhere, particularly in film and literature. We all know that character in every romance movie who thinks they don't want to find a partner, but by the end, they are hopelessly in love. They couldn't even see why they didn't want love before. They were empty before they met the love of their lives.

Now, this can be okay sometimes. If you are in a relationship where you are happy, and you make your partner happy, that's amazing! All the power to you. This article is not geared toward you. I can appreciate and respect that love exists, and it is all over the place!

Given this, so many people, particularly in the high school and college age, are believing this idea that you are not whole until you have found your "person." The problem with this is, instead of promoting the idea that ensuring your own self-love and confidence would help you to allow others to love you as well, we are forcing teenagers and young adults to get into relationships with people they are unhappy with. And they are too scared to leave their unhappy, unhealthy relationship because of an innate fear of being alone that has been instilled since childhood.

So, instead of leaving this unhappy relationship to look for one of the other 7.6 billion people in the world, they stay with someone who isn't right for them. Seems crazy on paper, doesn't it? The fundamental need for a partner, which has been rooted in a systematic society, causes people to stay with, and eventually marry, someone they don't love.

No wonder 46% of marriages end in divorce.

We have covered up this statistic practically to the point of normalization. But this should be shocking, infuriating even! It should make us question our systematic view of love! Almost half of the people who get married end up divorced. Almost half. Has it sunk in yet?

Don't get me wrong, I believe 100% in true love. I believe that it happens often. My parents have been married for 24 years and they are absolutely in love. There are hardships, and ups and downs, but they put in the work because they love each other so intensely. So no, I'm not saying that true love doesn't exist.

What I am trying to say is that there is more to life that can make you happy than finding your 'true love,' and your self-worth is not defined by your ability to find a partner. Your biggest dream should be doing what makes YOU happy. For some people, that's finding your true love and settling down. For others, it's building up their career and finding happiness in that. And sometimes it's neither of those; it's something different for every single person. But we have zero right to disapprove of others' choices and priorities. Your dream should be your own happiness, not based on what society thinks is right.

Not to mention, your decisions are yours alone! So can we stop shaming those who choose differently than ourselves?

You are not broken because you don't want to settle down. You are not incomplete. You are whole because of you, not because of an idealized notion of love. Do what makes you happy.

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