1. Set goals outside your relationship. Do not put your relationship as your top priority. Ever. If you find yourself in that situation. GET OUT. You should have at least two priorities above your relationship to keep a healthy connection. Usually your health and your career should be the first two priorities and driving forces to your life.
2.(continued from no.1) Your partner should not be your everything. This means you should be good friends with your partner but never best friends because mystery is always the key to attraction. Think of the way you met and the honeymoon phase that followed. Sometimes less is more.
3. DO NOT ASK FOR REASSURANCE. Toxic insecurity leads to a dramatic decrease of attraction. Testing and making your partner prove themselves worthy of a relationship with you will not make them crave a relationship, it will actually do the opposite. If you do not feel appreciated in your relationship there is usually a reason and you shouldn’t be with someone that lessens your worth. However, constantly asking for reassurance is never the way to go.
4. (continued from no. 3) MEN ARE NOT WOMEN. Therefore, they will never communicate the way women do. Men are usually more simple than women. The sooner you understand that and accept it the better off you’ll be. Learn to be confident and secure in their love and only then your love will grow stronger.
5. Your partner should be a highlight to your life but they aren’t the ones to make you happy. YOU MAKE YOU HAPPY. Happiness is your own responsibility. Remember that most of what your partner does while you are in a relationship with them is not about you so do not try to find a hidden meaning behind everything they do. Also remember you have no control over what they do, you just have control over how you react.
6. Do not use victim language/ mentality. Understand that your partner usually does not intentionally do anything TO you. Your partner made a decision in their life. And you had a reaction. Be conscious of your wording, instead of saying you MAKE me feel disrespected say I feel disrespected when you do (whatever it is). He can’t make you a “crazy person” and you give away your power when you assume your worth is less than it actually is.