You know those articles about how to perfect your relationship? Ya know, the ones that talk about how you just know you've found your forever love or "9 Ways To Strengthen Your Relationship"?

Well I'm hear to let you in on a little secret: they're all crap.

There is no right way to do relationships.

All relationships are different. We all have our own individual strengths, weaknesses, troubles and joys, and it's impossible to make all our relationships fit in the same box. They just can't.

Don't get me wrong, looking up to relationships that we admire is a beautiful thing. It gives us an idea of what love looks like and what to do (as well as what not to do). But it can be toxic to compare your relationship to someone else's.

Just because someone has been dating for a while does not mean they have a stronger relationship than you. Let me say that again because I think it needs to sink in: Just because someone has been dating for a while does not mean they have a stronger relationship than you.

Sometimes those couples that have just been together "forever" have become too comfortable in their relationship and they don't know how to be alone. They've become stagnant; they might as well be moving backwards.

Just like we can become motionless in our relationships with significant others, we can do the same in our relationship with God. A comfortable relationship with God or one another is just as dangerous as no relationship at all.

Complacency in your relationship with God will have the opposite effect that it's meant to have. He wants you to grow and to learn. And He gives us our human relationships in order to help us with that as well.

Relationships are meant to stretch us. They're meant to teach us and mold us into better humans. What good is a relationship doing you if it doesn't change you for the better?

We need to stop striving to make our relationships fit the same mold as those we admire and start focusing on how those relationships are stretching us. Is your relationship making you into a person that you like to see in the mirror, or is it having the opposite effect?

If we don't make the effort, our relationships will become stagnant, and that should terrify you. But the effort and the hardship that goes into these refining relationships will be so worth it.

So toss away those "how to" articles about bettering your relationship. Don't reach for comfort. Find those who will push you to do better, those who won't let you settle for second best.

You deserve it.