People come and go in life, and sometimes we are blinded by emotional factors that we don't realize how toxic any friendship or relationship can be. In fact, 1 in 4 women and 1 in 3 men will be in an unhealthy relationship at some point in their life. Unhealthy relationships can start early and last a lifetime, so getting rid of the toxic association with people is an optimal but hard decision. Here are ten steps to recover from an unhealthy relationship:
1. Learn the signs of an unhealthy relationship.
Know how you deserve and want to be treated. Unhealthy relationships take many forms- from mild to extreme- and can be emotionally, verbally, and physically abusive.
2. Practice self-forgiveness.
Self-compassion and forgiveness were just as important to healing as letting someone go. Know that even if you made some mistakes, things will get better.
3. Acknowledge your emotions.
To keep moving forward, you have to allow yourself to grieve and express your feelings.
4. Create a support system.
It is vitally important to have a support system to help you step outside of your toxic situation mentally and see it for what it is from a new angle.
5. Dedicate as much alone time as you need to heal.
You don't need to get back out there and pretend like everything's okay. Self-care is the most important thing right now.
6. Understand that the healing process takes time.
No form of loss is easy- you just have to take things one day at a time.
7. Re-establish your identity.
Take time to appreciate how amazing of a person you are and the positive impact you've had on others. Realize that your purpose cannot revolve around another person only.
8. Focus on the positives.
Letting go of someone you care about is hard. However, healing begins when you acknowledge all that you've been through. You can train yourself to focus on the positives in life by finding creative ways to spend your time.
9. Build healthy connections.
One of the best ways to free yourself from unhealthy associations is to start investing in healthy ones. Develop other close, connected, and bonded relationships- the ones that we all want and need.
10. Don’t let this stop you.
Just because one relationship didn't work out or a friendship ended that doesn't mean it's the end of the world. There are people who will be worth it, and you just have to be strong enough to defend and protect yourself.
"Do not hold your breath for anyone,
Do not wish your lungs to be still,
It may delay the cracks from spreading,
But eventually they will.
Sometimes to keep yourself together
You must allow yourself to leave,
Even if breaking your own heart
Is what it takes to let you breathe."
- Erin Hanson
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