I’ve always found dreams incredibly interesting...being able to experience something that feels so lifelike while you’re asleep is so cool! Luckily, I almost always remember mine. So upon the suggestion of a friend, I decided I’d write down the dreams I had every night for a week and try to analyze them and figure out what they mean in the context of my daily life and my future.

Dream 1

I got into a fender bender and it was my fault. The guy in the other car was really nice about it; in fact, he was actually flirting with me and asked me out, but he wasn’t my type. I remember calling and asking my Dad for assistance, but he seemed unwilling to help, perhaps because it wasn’t that big of a deal to the guy whose car I hit.

What does it mean?: This summer, I dented my rental car and I’m still waiting to hear back from the insurance company about how much it will cost. This worry could’ve been hiding deep in my subconscious, because it was actually something I forgot about. My Dad seems to be chill about this whole rental car issue, so that may have been why he didn’t freak out about my accident in the dream. Nobody at Enterprise seemed to want to take me on a date though.

Dream 2

I was at a family party with my aunts, uncles, and cousins. It seemed to be either the first time I was seeing them after returning from my summer in LA or it was the last time I would be seeing them prior to moving to LA for good. My aunt, (Titi) Veronica, expressed that she’s not ready for me to move to LA and only see me twice a year.

What does it mean?: I’m very close with my family, so this dream actually made me a little sad when I woke up. As mentioned in some of my previous articles, I moved to LA this summer for an internship and after finishing my degree, I plan on returning to LA and living there for quite some time. The only downside to this is that my whole family lives on the east coast, between New York and New Jersey, and it will be hard being so far from them and seeing them less. It’s fitting that my Titi Veronica was the one to tell me that she’s not looking forward to my potential move back to LA because I’ve always had the closest relationship with her.

Dream 3

I was in my Indiana University Spanish class from last year. Our assignment was that we each had to get up in front of the class and talk about ourselves. Some students had prepared very elaborate presentations. When it was my turn, I just got up and told the class everything I’ve done since graduating high school, such as attending a performing arts conservatory, acting in New York City, returning to college, doing the Disney College Program, attending IU, and everything in between, up until present day. In the class, I recognized some students I went to high school or conservatory with.

What does it mean?: As everyone is going back to IU for the school year, I’ve been thinking about IU and my decision not to return, which could’ve been why I was in an IU classroom. I remember being nervous to get up in front of the class and talk about myself, which is weird, because I’m usually very comfortable with public speaking. I think I was just embarrassed by what I perceived as a lack of accomplishments, but speaking about them aloud made me realize all that I’ve actually done. Seeing people I went to high school and conservatory with probably means that I should stop comparing my successes to those of others and be proud of where I currently am in life and what path I’m on.

Dream 4

I was in some kind of hippie house for the purpose of spiritual healing. I saw all my cousins and we took turns bathing in the pool, where some healer and his wife performed a spiritual cleansing on us. I specifically saw two female cousins, who are both a couple years younger than me, leaving the pool.

What does it mean?: I had this dream a couple nights after I went to a yoga and meditation festival, which could explain the setting of the dream. While at the festival, during a yoga class, I felt as if I was nearly experiencing a spiritual awakening, but perhaps I didn’t let myself go deep enough into it, out of fear or uneasiness. This dream could signify that I should’ve let myself succumb to the experience because it’s what I needed, or that next time I should dive right into it, because subconsciously, I’m ready. The fact that I saw those two specific cousins, who have full time jobs, could be another way I’m reflecting on my life’s achievements and comparing myself, since they are younger than me and already have their lives practically in order.

Dream 5

I was in my old apartment in NYC, but with new roommates. One night, my roommate had friends over for a small party, none of whom I recognized, except one of my friends from Indiana. Most of my roommate’s friends were hanging out in her room and then one girl burst into the room saying she had been raped by another guy that was at the apartment party. I remember trying to offer my help, but then going back to my room.

What does it mean?: The night I had this dream, I was in the midst of many complications with the current apartment I’m going to be renting for the year. This dream could’ve signified that I wish the moving in process could be as easy as it was when I rented my first apartment in New York. Rape, in a dream, usually could be a representation of sexual fears or a past physical trauma, manifesting itself subconsciously. I’ve never been sexually assaulted, but it is one of my fears, and I do recall a few uncomfortable and unpleasant sexual experiences while living in that apartment, so it’s possible my subconscious associates those experiences with my old apartment.

Recording and analyzing my dreams for a week has really opened my eyes to what my subconscious is trying to tell me in my waking life. There are obviously some fears and anxieties that I’m aware of, but not directly facing. These dreams could probably be analyzed in greater depth, but here’s what I surmised from the interpretations:

1. I need to confront the fact that if I move to the west coast, the time I have with my family will be limited. I need to really ask myself if I’m ready to make that kind of sacrifice.
2. I need to stop comparing myself to other people and focus on myself. Everyone has a different path and I can’t measure my success by how successful those around me are.
3. As the yoga instructor at the festival spoke about, we all have demons that we need to deal with, but until you face them head on, they will chase you around for the rest of your life. It’s time that I start cleansing myself of those demons before moving onto the next chapter in my life.