Why You Might Want To Reconsider If You Support "Anti-Abortion"

Why You Might Want To Reconsider If You Support "Anti-Abortion"

Are you ready to adopt some of the thousands of foster care children?

If you are against abortions, would you be willing to adopt some of the thousands of kids that are placed into foster care and put up for adoption because their parents had them when they couldn’t take care of them?

If abortions were illegal, people would have kids even if they didn’t want them or they would be placed in foster care.

In America, about 670,000 children (as of 2015) have spent time in foster care. In that same year (2015), about 62,000 children’s parents lost parental rights and all of those children had to wait to be adopted or had to age out of the foster care system.

A summary is simply this: hundreds of thousands of children are awaiting foster families and for the chance to be adopted because their parents didn’t want them, didn’t know how to care for them, or couldn’t even care for themselves, let alone children.

People aren’t even adopting all of the foster children who went unwanted. This means 20,000 children aged out of the system, meaning they turned 18 and were thrown out into the world on their own.

Yes, some children went through transition programs, but some were not given the choice or did not take the opportunity and repeated the cycle.

Take a look at the multiple news sources that are shouting articles along the lines of “Number of Foster Care Children Growing At An Alarming Rate." The number of children in foster care is increasing gradually.

If we implement anti-abortion laws around America’s states, what would that mean for further foster care numbers? Most likely, we would see a tremendous increase in foster care children and adults aging out of the system, resulting in more adults who make less-than-pleasant choices.

Maybe you think the foster care children might not affect you personally.

We were paying, as taxpayers in 2006, about $40,000 on each child in foster care or about $22 Billion in taxes a year as American people altogether. It's 2017 and this has gone up.

Let's also take a look at more ethical reasons. Yes, many people believe that abortions are ‘murder’. To some people, yes, it is. Let’s take a look at more of the reality that foster care children face when born to parents who didn’t necessarily want them.

Children who are unwanted by their parents are often abused physically, sexually or mentally. They can also be neglected by their parents, meaning that they will not receive enough food, love, warmth, medical care, clothes, etc. This can result in a child’s self-esteem deteriorating and, if we look at it on a larger level, we could see an increase of violence and mental imbalance in our society.

Neglect and abuse from parents will result in handfuls of children who need more help from taxpayers, including help in schools, money towards jails and prisons if a child lives their life only knowing hatred, violence and crime, more taxes for welfare programs to help these foster care children when they are on their own, more taxes for programs to get aging out foster kids on their feet and so, so much more.

Abortion is not an easy thing to do, but neither is bringing a child into the world where they are hated, abused or neglected. It’s easy to say to a person who doesn’t want a child to "just not get pregnant and practice safe sex." Let’s be honest here. Some people lack the intelligence to use preventative practices. It’s reality.

I’m not saying they should use abortion to get out of their mistakes. I believe that abortions should be justified and more testing after an abortion should be done to implement the understanding of what may have been done in certain cases. More classes should be available for those who need to understand preventative care and, perhaps, how to care for a child.

If we think about anti-abortion being a law, we would probably see an increase in child and young-adult suicides. Teens and young adults who know they are unloved and see no way to make their life different might take suicide as a way out.

What do we want for a child who we know might live their life to be hated? Early termination or a life of pain and a feeling of hopelessness and ultimate suicide?

Yes, there are always those who get adopted.

How can I forget those who are adopted and support pro-choice when we could be terminating the life of a child who could have a chance at a better life?

I understand how hard the decision can be.

I have personally seen a painful life lived by someone close to me who was unwanted, abused, neglected and mistreated by their parents. I personally know what a second chance can mean, but I stick with this decision: Pro-choice, not pro-abortion. I believe that if a woman is absolutely not ready to care for a child, they should not.

So unless you are shouting "Anti-Abortion!" because you want to adopt and care for those in foster-care, I suggest you take a step back and ask yourself why you are taking that stand. I'm not saying you can't be anti-abortion, but I don’t believe it can simply be because "I don’t want a baby murdered!" It is more complex than that. If you are willing to tell a woman that she can’t get an abortion because she knows she will lose her child to the foster care system, then you should be willing to take that child in and change its life for the better.

Cover Image Credit: ThePrettyLieOrTheUglyTruth

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To The Boy Who Will Love Me Next

If you can't understand these few things, leave before things get too involved

To the boy that will love me next, I need you to know and understand things about me and my past. The things I have been though not only have shaped the person I’ve become, but also sometimes controls my life. In the past I’ve been used, abused, and taken for granted, and I want something real this time. The guys before you were just boys; they didn’t know how to treat me until it was too late. They didn’t understand how to love me, until I broke my own heart. Before you truly decide to love me I want you to understand these things.

When I tell you something, please listen.

I’m my own person, I want to be loved a certain way. If I ask you to come over and watch movies with me please do it, if I ask for you to leave me alone for a few hours because it’s a girl’s night please do it. I don’t just say things to hear my own voice, I say things to you because it’s important to my life and the way I want to be loved. I’m not a needy person when it comes to being loved and cared for, but I do ask for you to do the small things that I am say.

Forgive my past.

My past is not a pretty brick road, it is a highway that has a bunch of potholes and cracks in it. I have a lot of baggage, and most of it you won’t understand. But don’t let my past decided whether you want to love me or not. My past has helped form who I am today, but it does not define who I am. My past experiences might try and make an appearance every once in a while, but I will not go back to that person I once was, I will not return to all that hurt I once went though. When I say those things, I’m telling the complete and honest truth. I relive my past every day, somethings haunt me and somethings are good reminds. But for you to love me, I need you to accept my past, present and future.

I’m just another bro to the other guys.

I have always hung out with boys, I don’t fit in with the girl groups. I have 10 close girlfriends, but the majority of my friends are guy, but don’t let this scare you. If I wanted to be with one of my guy friends I would already be with him, and if you haven’t noticed I don’t want them because I’m with you. I will not lose my friendships with all my guy friends to be able to stay with you. I will not cut off ties because you don’t like my guy friends. I have lost too many buddies because of my ex-boyfriends and I promised myself I wouldn’t do that again. If you don’t like how many guy friends I have you can leave now. Don’t bother trying to date me if you can accept the fact I’m just another bro.

I might be a badass, but I actually have a big heart.

To a lot of people I come off to be a very crazy and wild girl. I will agree I can be crazy and wild, but I’m more than that. I’m independent, caring, responsible, understanding, forgiving, and so such more type of woman. Many people think that I’m a badass because I don’t take any negatively from anyone. Just like we learned when we were younger, “if you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say it at all.” Most people can’t do that in today’s world, so I stick up for myself and my friends. I don’t care what anyone thinks about me, or their option on how I live my life. The only thing I care about is being able to make myself happy. Even though I’m an independent woman, understand that I do have a big heart. Honesty when I truly care for someone I will do just about anything they ask, but don’t take advantage of this. Once you take advantage of this part of me, all respect will be lost for you.

I’m hard to love.

Sometimes I want to be cuddle and get attention, and sometimes I don’t want you to talk to me for a couple hours. Sometimes I want you to take me out for a nice meal, but sometimes I want a home cooked meal. Every day is different for me, sometimes I change my mind every hour. My mood swings are terrible on certain days, and on those days you should probably just ignore me. I’m not easy to love, so you’ll either be willing to find a way to love me, or you’ll walk out like so many others have.

I’m scared.

I’m scared to love someone again. I’ve been hurt, heartbroken, and beat to the ground in my past relationships. I want to believe you are different, I want to hope things will truly work out, but every relationship has always ended up the same way. I’m scared to trust someone, put my whole heart into them, just to be left and heartbroken again. I sick and tired of putting my whole body and soul into someone for them to just leave when it is convenient for them. If you want to love me, understand it won’t be easy for me to love you back.

When “I’m done.”

When I say “I’m done” I honestly don’t mean that I’m done. When I say that it means I need and want you to fight for me, show me why you want to be with me. I need you to prove that I’m worth it and there’s no one else but me. If I was truly done, I would just walk away, and not come back. So if I ever tell you, “I’m done,” tell me all the reasons why I’m truly not done.

For the boy who will love me next, the work is cut out for you, you just have to be willing to do it. I’m not like other girls, I am my own person, and I will need to be treated as such. For the boy that will love me next, don’t bother with me unless you really want to be with me. I don’t have time to waste on you if you aren’t going to try and make something out of us. To the boy who will love me next, the last thing I would like to say is good luck, I have faith in you.

Cover Image Credit: Danielle Balint

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When Words Are Not Enough

Sometimes you just need to be.


Life is a roller-coaster of ups and downs. We all desire easy fruitful lives where no one ever dies and no one ever leaves. Instead, we suffer through hardships and great trials that test our faith. These conflicts often leave us worn down and feeling helpless. This is the time when words become a languid breeze, going through one ear and out the other. This is what you should do when words are not enough to satiate the pain you hold in trembling hands.

Focus all your energy into just being. No one expects you to get over the tragedy that occurred in your life, so don't force yourself. Just eat, breathe, and sleep until you feel up to doing normal tasks. Whatever circumstance that has stolen your breath and turned your life upside down won't go a week in a couple of days or a week. Wounds like yours don't go away instantly; instead, they take time and nurturing. Sometimes it's best to keep a sore covered but in some circumstances, know that seeing someone is okay.

These tragedies you face are real, and they try to break down the very substances that make you who you are. Counselors and therapists can help you make sense of the burden you carry. There are many reasons why you might be hesitant to see a therapist, but if the burden you carry becomes too much, a therapist can help you lighten that load.

Know that what you are going through is real and it is tough, but you will make it out on top. You are a survivor and a success story. Every single bad thing that has tried to tear you down hasn't succeeded, and this will be no different. Trust me, your story is not over.

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