Roses, chocolate, hearts, glitter, and cupids litter the country this time of year. It seems like everywhere you go some romantic jackass has vomited love and gushiness everywhere.

Yeah, yeah. I get it. I am a total scrouge who is bitter and a total cliche of a Valentine's Day hater.

But I actually don't totally hate the holiday. It is just so dumb that people get insanely mushy and yuck in PUBLIC ALL ON THE SAME DAY AND I DON'T WANT TO SEE THAT CRAP.

So I propose you spend the day with those you love most: your friends.

Full disclosure — I am a straight female who identifies as a woman so these reasons are really tailored towards me and people who also date dumb-ass guys who don't know the difference between an Anastasia highlighter and a neon marker.

1. Your friends have been there way longer than your partner.

And they will be there when they are gone.

2. You can gorge on chocolate and not have to worry.

You don't have to fret about getting bloated or looking nasty with a ton of chocolate waste on your face.

3. You can get SLOPPY DRUNK.

We can all agree getting sloppy drunk on a date is tacky. Plus, no guy wants to hold your hair back while your vomiting and crying when the original plan was to get laid. Fortunately, our women friends are always down.

4. Bake all of the goodies.

It may be a little 1950s housewife but still, you can bake all of the goodies and then eat all of the goodies.

5. You can reflect on all of the terrible guys and gals you've dated.

Please do not do this on Valentine's Day with your partner...

6. Valentine's Day is way too much pressure anyways.

Does anyone ever actually enjoy Valentine's Day or am I just an old hag?

7. Bros before hoes.

Not that your partner is a hoe or your friends are all dudes but I really thought that the essence of this applied.

8. Your friends will be your friends forever, but will bae actually be around next year?

Yeah, I know. I'm pretty cynical, but when you look back, there isn't going to be a messy break-up that will haunt your memories.

9. They will actually notice how much effort you put into your hair and makeup.

I am sorry, but chances are bae doesn't know the difference between eyeliner and a pen.

10. When else can you dress up and go out for dinner and drinks with your friends?

Sure, you could go to homecoming but chances are if you can legally drink, you're no longer in high school.

11. It's trendy to hate Valentine's Day.

Be hip, be cool.