Women will never be equal.

The Reality Is, Women Have No Way Of Winning In This Society

It's time we stopped apologizing for being ourselves.

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In the age of the annual Women's March and the #MeToo movement, it's easy to claim that we live in a reformed society. A society that respects women and treats us as equals. A society that doesn't automatically question our everyday decisions, questions not posed to males. While women in America have made incredible strides in the fight for equality, the double standard unfortunately still exists.

However, the way in which we choose to discriminate against and admonish women for being themselves has changed. Inequality is no longer about preventing a whole gender from voting or keeping women out of the workplace. Instead, it is in the subtle comments made about our everyday choices. "Why is she wearing that?" "She's asking for it." "She's too nice." "She's not nice enough."

It is in the negative connotation that still comes with the word "feminist." Since when did a term that stood for equality threaten the rights of others? Last I checked, a feminist, by definition, was someone who supports equality between sexes. So why do people still have a problem with it?

Equality is about more than just passing laws that support all individuals.

True equality is achieved when individuals of society change their thoughts and mannerisms. When a female rape victim is no longer asked first what she was wearing or if she was drinking or if she in any way made a man feel like she wanted something that she clearly didn't want. When a woman isn't passed up for a promotion because she doesn't fit the "image" that the position was looking for. It is truly incredible how we, as a society, have normalized this inequality.

Women have no way of winning in a society that is programmed to criticize their every choice. Either she's a prude or she's a slut. Either she's too timid or she's too aggressive. Either she wears too much makeup or she doesn't care at all about her appearance. She is never enough. We are never enough.

If he screams, he's passionate. If she screams, she's hostile. Why? Why is it that the automatic response toward females is one with a negative connotation? We shouldn't have to apologize for being ourselves, and we sure as hell don't need to be held to an impossible standard that doesn't pertain to men. How can women be expected to reach their full potential if we're still being torn down?

It's time we start changing the way we think. And this isn't just about women supporting women. Men, this applies to you, too. How can we ever strive for equality if it's not present at home, at school, or at work? Change starts with the individual, and it's about time for some change.

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I'm The Girl Who'd Rather Raise A Family Than A Feminist Protest Sign

You raise your protest picket signs and I’ll raise my white picket fence.
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Social Media feeds are constantly filled with quotes on women's rights, protests with mobs of women, and an array of cleverly worded picket signs.

Good for them, standing up for their beliefs and opinions. Will I be joining my tight-knit family of the same gender?

Nope, no thank you.

Don't get me wrong, I am not going to be oblivious to my history and the advancements that women have fought to achieve. I am aware that the strides made by many women before me have provided us with voting rights, a voice, equality, and equal pay in the workforce.

SEE ALSO: To The Girl Who Would Rather Raise A Family Than A Feminist Protest Sign

For that, I am deeply thankful. But at this day in age, I know more female managers in the workforce than male. I know more women in business than men. I know more female students in STEM programs than male students. So what’s with all the hype? We are girl bosses, we can run the world, we don’t need to fight the system anymore.

Please stop.

Because it is insulting to the rest of us girls who are okay with being homemakers, wives, or stay-at-home moms. It's dividing our sisterhood, and it needs to stop.

All these protests and strong statements make us feel like now we HAVE to obtain a power position in our career. It's our rightful duty to our sisters. And if we do not, we are a disappointment to the gender and it makes us look weak.

Weak to the point where I feel ashamed to say to a friend “I want to be a stay at home mom someday.” Then have them look at me like I must have been brain-washed by a man because that can be the only explanation. I'm tired of feeling belittled for being a traditionalist.

Why?

Because why should I feel bad for wanting to create a comfortable home for my future family, cooking for my husband, being a soccer mom, keeping my house tidy? Because honestly, I cannot wait.

I will have no problem taking my future husband’s last name, and following his lead.

The Bible appoints men to be the head of a family, and for wives to submit to their husbands. (This can be interpreted in so many ways, so don't get your panties in a bunch at the word “submit”). God specifically made women to be gentle and caring, and we should not be afraid to embrace that. God created men to be leaders with the strength to carry the weight of a family.

However, in no way does this mean that the roles cannot be flipped. If you want to take on the responsibility, by all means, you go girl. But for me personally? I'm sensitive, I cry during horror movies, I'm afraid of basements and dark rooms. I, in no way, am strong enough to take on the tasks that men have been appointed to. And I'm okay with that.

So please, let me look forward to baking cookies for bake sales and driving a mom car.

And I'll support you in your endeavors and climb to the top of the corporate ladder. It doesn't matter what side you are on as long as we support each other, because we all need some girl power.

Cover Image Credit: Unsplash

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To The Congress Members Of Ohio: Birth Control Isn't Abortion

It's called birth control for a reason!

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To the Congress Members Of Ohio: birth control isn't abortion.

But before I go further: what am I even talking about?

As of May 7th, 2019, there is an Ohio bill up for debate. In the article about the bill on www.thestatenews.org, written by Jo Ingles, it states that "The bill would ban non-therapeutic abortions that include "drugs or devices used to prevent the implantation of a fertilized ovum". What this means is birth control could be not covered by insurance companies because it is considered a non-therapeutic abortion.

First, let's start with the definition of birth control itself.

According to Google, the definition of birth control is "the practice of preventing unwanted pregnancies, especially by use of contraception". Is there any mention of abortion in that definition? I don't think so.

Birth control is for prevention against pregnancies.

The key word here is prevention. In order to combat abortion rates, the answer isn't to outlaw abortion. It is to prevent pregnancy in the first place. One of the ways we can do that is birth control.

How is this done? There are three methods of birth control. Medicinenet.com says that "Birth control methods can be broadly classified into barrier methods (that prevent sperm cells from reaching the egg), methods that prevent ovulation such as the birth control pill, and methods that allow fertilization of the egg but prevent implantation of the fertilized egg inside the uterus (womb) such as the IUD (intrauterine device)".

With all of these different ways to use birth control, it is extremely helpful for women to have safe sex without fear of contraception. Although the failure rate isn't 100%, it is better than not using any birth control method at all. The goal is to limit unintended pregnancies, and birth control is one of the most effective ways of doing so.

Birth control isn't just for protection against pregnancy.

Women across the country use birth control for other reasons other than fighting against pregnancy. It is beneficiary in aiding many other diseases and ailments. WebMD states some other reasons why women use birth control. They use it to help with "premenstrual syndrome (PMS), premenstrual dysphoria disorder (PMSDD), painful and/or irregular periods, acne, endometriosis, and polycystic ovarian syndrome (PCOS)."

On top of helping with these issues, birth control has other health benefits. "Because birth control pills cut back on the amount of bleeding you have during your period, you may also be less likely to get anemia, or low levels of red blood cells. They've also been linked to lower rates of ovarian and uterine cancers." There are also lower risks of ectopic pregnancy. Birth control has so many health benefits-- without it many women's lives would be negatively affected.

Without insurance coverage, birth control is expensive.

If there was no insurance coverage for birth control, it would be unattainable for many women, especially those struggling with finances. Birth control pills on average cost "up to $50 without insurance...a year's supply could cost up to $600" (Birthcontrol.com 2018). For the birth control shot "...depending on your level of coverage, the first shot can cost anywhere from $0 to $250. Any subsequent visits for follow-up shots can cost anywhere up to $150" (Birthcontrol.com, 2018).

What about the IUD or implant? For the implant it ranges from $300 to $800 (Birthcontrol.com, 2018). The IUD costs between $500 and $858 (Birthcontrol.com, 2018). Would you rather have to fork $500 to purchase an IUD, pay this month's rent, or put food on the table? This would be the harsh reality for lower-income women if they were denied insurance coverage.

Ohio Congress Members, do your research first before you make bills.

Republican John Becker who sponsors the bill seems to believe that the bill will not affect birth control, but it will. He states "'When you get into the contraception and abortifacients, that's clearly not my area of expertise but I suppose, if it were true that what we typically known as the pill would be classified as an abortifacient, then I would imagine the drug manufacturers would reformulate it so it's no longer an abortifacient and is strictly a contraceptive," Becker says'" (Birthcontrol.com, 2018).

A word of advice: if you do not know how birth control works, don't make a law that possibly prohibits its use. I would do my research before even thinking that a bill like that would even fly. The more you know about the field of interest, the more credible your bill will be. Along with this comes integrity as a member in office. We need to stop electing those who are uninformed.

Long story short, Congress Members, look out for your fellow women. Don't ban birth control, that's not cool. It's a violation of women's bodily autonomy and rights for health care.

How can we stop it? By being informed and voting!

Living in the United States gives us the privilege as citizens to be able to vote. Our founding fathers made this country a democracy for a reason: don't waste it. Your voice matters. Your opinion matters.

It's not possible to be in the dark about politics anymore because it's on our social media platforms, websites, television screens, and what we read. It's not okay to hide from it and pick and choose when to participate. Silence is acceptance; silence is tolerance. Wake up before it is too late. Do your research and do your duty. You can be part of the change to bettering politics.

Here are the links to the articles I took information from, feel free to check them out!

Article about Ohio Abortion Bill

Other Reasons To Use Birth Control

How Much Birth Control Costs Out-of-Pocket

Birth Control Methods

The Definition of Birth Control

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