This semester, my roommate is in a gender studies class, so I frequently hear about the abstract concepts they focus on. Recently, they have been debating on whether gender is a natural concept or if it is socially constructed. On one hand, the concept of masculinity and femininity seems to be something that changes by culture, generation, and location. This would point out that the stereotypes of each might be directed by the social environment, however, the question still remains: What about the genetic physical differences between female and male? Does this mean anything? The whole topic is rather mind boggling, but from it, I drew a rather important message.

That is this: Whether gender stereotypes are given at birth or whether they are learned, it is important for parents to raise boys and girls the same. Boys should learn about femininity just as much as they learn about how to be masculine, and the other way around. Too often parents shower their little boys in toy cars and sporting clothes, giving their girls the pink princesses and nail polish. However, what if this is just something children are taught to want and not what their hearts actually desire? This is where masculinity is over-exhibited by grown men, who are taught at a young age that feelings are feminine, and femininity in a male is unattractive. As a society we have the opportunity to enhance the way we raise children in order to have a more accepting and loving future generation.

One of the most beautiful things I have ever seen happened a few years ago in a nail salon, when I was getting polished for the season of Christmas. I was just watching a mom interact with her son, who I could tell was getting impatient with just sitting around waiting for his mom to finish. His mom told him to go over to the nail polishes and pick his favorite color, probably just expecting him to pick a color and then go put it back. Instead, he picked a light blue color and asked if he could get his nails done that color. At first, she asked, “Are you sure you want to paint your nails, dude?” He said he did, and without a beat missed she said, “OK, sit down next to me and you can go next.” I loved this moment so much. It was special to me to see a mom not tell him no because he was a boy, but to honor what he wanted. We need more mothers and fathers like this.

So, as we go forth in the future as moms and dads or even aunts, uncles, and babysitters, let us think about these constructed stereotypes and how dangerous they can be. Let us think twice before assuming a little boy wants to play video games or a little girl wants to go inside and have a tea party instead of playing football outside. Let us consider gender equality and know that boys and girls have the right to be treated the same until they can decide how they want to represent themselves. This is the gift of a child -- a new little person who will grow into a beautiful person inside and out, and it is a crime to stifle that.