In my head I built the image of college professors looking, speaking, and acting very formally. Through just one semester of college, I can already throw that image out the window. Here are some of my favorite quotes from various professors.
1. "You can win over anybody with a deep understanding of the metric system"
Let me just tell you, I tested this theory, and my girlfriend was not impressed.
2. "They won't fire me if I tell them the course materials are TBD instead of N/A."
Not gonna lie, I was fine with this because it meant I didn't have to spend a ridiculous amount of money on a textbook I'm gonna use once.
4. "What's everyone doing here? Doesn't this start at 11? Oh no, it started 8 minutes ago."
I feel like this is something Creed from "The Office" would say.
5. "How dare my son end my lineage by refusing to have kids because he doesn't want the kid to go through inconveniences like job interviews?"
He started disgracing his own son for not wanting children, like geez, take a chill pill, man, if you're getting this angry over nothing then it's probably a good thing your lineage isn't gonna continue.
6. "Cardi B is the only person on this earth capable of running this country"
Well, they're not wrong.
7. "I've worked with chimpanzees smarter than you."
Not the first time I've had this said to me before.
8. "Dudes in the back playing "Fortnite," you guys understanding this?"
Somehow those dudes in the back playing "Fortnite" all got A's and I feel cheated.
9. "My mom just won $10,000 so peace out, I'll see you in hell."
Class was canceled for the next week.
10. "Cut those toxic bitches who don't let you copy homework out of your life."
Yes, this came out of the mouth of a college professor.
College professors are much less formal than you might think. All this weird stuff they've said really taught me that.