Freshman year of high school, I wanted a purity ring. I wanted to make a promise to God, my future husband, and me that I would save myself for marriage. I wanted a ring to symbolize this promise so my parents got me a purity ring. Ever since then I have worn this ring almost every day. I have never been ashamed of my promise, even sophomore year when one of my closest friends at the time implied I was a prude because I did not do certain things with my boyfriend at the time (she is not my friend anymore for obvious reasons). I could not comprehend how a person so close to me could insult a promise that she knew meant so much. I do not know if people think about that very much. The fact that there are people that get judged for not doing certain things that are “meant” to be done in a relationship or even with a stranger. I was not ashamed of my promise when she said that. I was mad, sure. But not ashamed. Then I got to college. I am still not ashamed of this promise but let’s be real. There is an expectation. It is normal to hookup (whatever that means… I still have no clear definition of that), it is normal to hit a home run after only two dates; it is normal to use our bodies more than our words.
Let’s also be clear that I am not judging anyone, I am only trying to make it known to the world that there are people that do not follow the typical expectations. I hate that once in a while, for only a split second, I find myself getting nervous to wear my ring. I find myself asking the questions, “What if a guy asks about it and thinks I am some kind of weirdo?” “What if he doesn’t get a chance to know me before running away?” I immediately respond to these thoughts with, “Well then he is not worth your time and not someone you want”. I know I deserve someone who will love me for me and not what I am willing to give them with my body (every person deserves this). Also, it is easier to get the chastity promise out in the open right away, so the ring definitely helps with that.
So yes, I am a virgin. I have a purity ring. I will save myself for my future husband. I am not just doing this because it is part of my religion. I am also doing this so that I know the man I end up with is the right man for me. This is not everyone’s choice and that is okay, but please don’t judge mine. Please don’t let your jaw drop when I tell you I am saving myself. Please don’t call me a prude or strange for making a promise to the love of my life. I am not ashamed because when I look down at my left hand and see that ring on my finger, I am reminded of the man I will one day be with. The man who will replace the chastity ring with a diamond. The man I am waiting for. The man that is waiting for me. The love of my life. My future husband. And I cannot help but smile.