It's Thanksgiving break, and I have all the time in the world to complete my assignments, to study for finals and prepare papers and presentations. Tell me, then, why do I find myself wasting day after day doing absolutely nothing but fretting over the amount of things I have to do? So overwhelmed by worry, I still can't focus on my work when I sit down to do it. This only creates a positive feedback loop and fuels my worry. Simply said, I'm going insane.

After what has been a ridiculous semester -- "stressed" doesn't even begin to explain how I feel -- I am seriously concerned over whether I will pass all of my classes. As a pre-med, this has my anxiety through the roof.

But why does my brain refuse to focus? Why am I making more bad decisions when I am suffering because of my previous bad decisions?

The fear of failure has me so withered down, my mind is subconsciously paralyzed to even comprehend the amount of catching-up I must do. One can say I am a deer in headlights, and I'm fighting with my last two brain cells left.

I wish I could be hopeful and say everything will be alright in the end, but the fact is I have to put in the hard work first before I can be hopeful. In my desperate need for motivation and commitment, I need to overcome the fear of failure in my 'academic rut'. I have been taught since childhood to avoid failure at all costs, and as a pre-med, that failure would signify the end of my career. Quite frankly, a huge part of me continues to believe this.

Talking to upperclassmen and fellow peers however, has lessened this fear. Everyone has a different journey, and has made it to similar places. I once took pride in my resilience, but now I need to believe in constant perseverance once again -- I need to never give up, because that keeps the end goal alive.

To all of you who are fighting to make it to the end of the semester, whether you're worried about classes or not or you have just had a rough year, we can do this. The end goal is all that matters. Imagine it, savor it, cherish it, and keep it in your heart these last couple weeks. We're going to need it.