Someone once told me that in movies, they shouldn’t make divorced parents end up together in the end (shots fired at The Parent Trap.) Of course, this is an understandable opinion considering that it can give young children the wrong idea about their separated parents getting back together. After considering her stance for a few moments, I responded, “Then they also shouldn’t be allowed to make boys chase down the girl in the ending.”

I know we have all seen an endless amount of romantic dramas where boy meets girl, they fall in love, boy screws up, boy makes en epic attempt to show girl how much he really does care for her, and both boy and girl ride off happily into the sunset. If you haven’t, then I highly suggest you go pick up any title with the words “adapted from a Nicholas Sparks novel” after it.

These films create a certain type of boy who is susceptible to any age, any race, any location. They teach us from a young age that when a boy messes up, all you have to do is give it a little time and he will be there standing at your door in the pouring rain, reciting a heartfelt apology that he poured his entire life into. They show us that when a boy pushes you away, instead of walking away from the situation, all you have to do is try a little harder to “fix him,” to find out why he doesn’t let people in. It is inevitable that he will eventually open up to you and admit that he’s madly in love with you, and has been this entire time,  and he'll thank you for making him into an actual emotional being. 

Forget about actually taking the experience of heartbreak and learning from it. Even if you do decide to move on, you are a crushed soul for a bit of time, before realizing that you couldn’t live your life on your own even if you wanted, and are relieved to find that he feels the exact same way.

Don’t get me wrong. I love romantic movies just as much as the next basic girl. I’m just saying, that we should not hold college boys to these standards. Miley Cyrus once said, “Guys watch too much porn. Those girls don’t exist. They’re not real girls. And that’s like us watching romance movies. That’s girl porn, because, like, those guys do no exist.” I’m definitely not saying that this excuses any jerk from behaving like a heartless guy who is merely rebelling against the “perfect boy” standard he is being held to. There is no excuse for being an inconsiderate human being. 

But I am advocating for realistic expectations. Don’t expect the boy you hooked up with on the dance floor of a frat for 10 minutes to show up at your house with insomnia and an invitation to his formal. And you cannot think that any boy who doesn’t text you back is just scared to let you in because he likes you too much. The fact of the matter is he probably has other girls he’s hooking up with and he doesn’t really feel the need to validate all of these relationships.

Trust me, I know that it’s hard to accept that you probably won’t be having any Notebook kissing-in-the-rain moments fairly soon. And it’s probably best advised to not wait around for a boy you were paired up with for a group project to silently fall madly in love with you and write you love letters. Unless, of course, you are Rachel McAdams. Then you are clearly the exception.