Intentionality is problematic. It takes work. It means opening up. It means caring. Intentionality is contradictory to our self-centered society because it requires us to think about others. It forces us to stop thinking about ourselves.
Intentionality isn’t easy. For some, it’s hard to break through surface-level relationships and experience the joy of a promising, deep friendship. Some think, "Why be intentional when they will only be in my life a short time?" We will be parting ways in just a few weeks, months, or years. Is it worth taking the time to really get to know one another?
However, the problem is not with intentionality. It’s the exact opposite. The problem is that we are going through our lives, surrounding ourselves with people, calling them our friends, but not breaking through the barrier of surface-level stuff. We are not making the most of the time that we have.
We make excuses that there isn’t enough time. Some people will only be in our lives shortly, so getting to know each other on a deeper level does not always come easily. But cultivating those friendships in the time that they are directly in your life will ensure that when the time comes for you to part ways, you will have a lasting friendship.
It’s so hard for us to get past the “hello, how are you?” and honestly ask, “How are you doing?” If these people we call friends mean so much to us, we need to be investing in their lives and getting to know more than just their favorite color. We should take the time out of our schedule to really spend time with them, asking them about their lives, and praying with them.
This carries into our faith as well. We should be living as intentional Christians and not have this idea that our faith is a passive one. I’m not saying force your beliefs down other people’s throats because that is a sure way to turn someone away. It just means being open: Sharing what God’s doing in your life and asking how He is working in others. It means starting intentional conversations and asking questions, whether it is to friends or strangers. We can’t shy away from our faith just because they might believe something different than we do.
Intentionality is being killed by passivity. I’m guilty of this. We are all guilty of this. But it can all change if we start thinking of ourselves a little less and others a little more. It can all change if we ask a friend to lunch or put our phones down and converse with those around us. It can all change if we start begin talking about real things and allow God to work through our choice of having an intentional conversation.
