Finally, after the cliffhanger no one liked or wanted, we get an answer to who Negan Eenie Meenie Miney Mo-ed. And in my Season Six B Review, I started to list out the events of this episode, only to realize half way through that none of what I was writing happened yet! I got a little ahead of myself, forgetting we had to wait all summer, after waiting an hour and a half, with only 10 minutes being dedicated to the new big bad the entire season had been hyping up, to never get that answer.
And does this premier episode open on the person getting hit? No it doesn’t! Instead, we get some more filler just avoiding the answer. Ignoring the fact that Negan assigns three words to each person, having no clue how the game works, it takes almost 14 minutes until we finally see who it was; It was Abraham. “He just took one, or six or seven for the team” (Gimple). It was 18. He took 18 for the team, I counted.
Then Negan taunts some more until Daryl’s had enough and punches him. So then Negan says “that’s a no no” (Gimple) and naturally kills Glenn just for kicks 18 minutes in? He wants to punish Daryl and make him a slave, as we see later on. Okay fine, don’t kill him. But then why kill Glenn, he just screamed once. Was it just to add more shock to the audience giving a two for one deal since A) they messed up Negan’s introduction last season and B) this is an iconic moment from the comics, they need to do something special?
Ultimately, that brings a bigger question: Why waste all that time with Season Six A teasing a Glenn death only to actually kill him here. They should have just done it then. His character had no further development in that time, and they even faked his death again when he first returned to Alexandria. But instead, Negan does it here, with a less impressive 17 whacks this time. Some might argue that’s overkill, but Negan’s a bit of a firecracker and wants to make a good first impression, as he does mention.
But you know what? After he hits Abraham once, Abraham says “suck my nuts” (Gimple) and Negan is amazed by this.
Then he hits him all those other times and finally gets onto Glenn after dilly dallying around. But then after two hits, Glenn is still there. Barely functioning, but he’s there.
Negan is surprised. Two times in a row, his surprised the guy gets back up. You know what, maybe you just hit like a pussy Negan, ever consider that? Follow up question: who cleans this bat afterwards? It always looks new, but some blood and skin I’d imagine would get caught against the wood and barbed wire. Does he replace the barbed wire each time? So many questions, so little answers.
Moving on, they threaten to cut off Carl’s hand off. Just sprout a set of grapes and do it! Make something unexpected happen. But the thing that really impressed me, was that Daryl’s punch didn’t complete destroy Negan, or that instead of saying “suck my nuts” (Gimple), Abraham didn’t just huff and puff and blown Negan 30 feet away into the night sky.
Negan nearly falls over after turning Glenn’s head into oatmeal. Sure, 17 swings take a lot out of you, but he almost falls over. Not to mention from a side profile he’s the same depth as a surf board.
I still maintain they should have casted someone else. My choice, Andrew Dice Clay. Look up his nursery rhymes and tell me I’m wrong. He’s the perfect choice for Negan. He even has his own version of Eenie Meenie Miney Mo. A far superior take on it, if you ask me.