Recommended for you

Start writing a post

relationships

Polyamory: 5 Things It Is And 5 Things It Isn't

Being polyamorous doesn't make you a player or easy.

asiakia123

Sep 04, 2018

Radford University Liberty University

https://www.instagram.com/p/Bj4VqCplzE0/?tagged=polyamoryflag

As we all know, college is a time to experience new and exciting things. So many crazy adventures are ahead of us in terms of who we hang out with and what relationships we decide to have with those people.

I've come across a lot of posts on social media about open relationships, which I think is amazing but some of the people posting these things mostly seem to have the wrong idea of what they are.

I asked around on my favorite blogging site and came across people who are or have been in polyamorous or open relationships and this is what they had to say about what polyamory is and isn't.

1. Is...Loving and consensual.

https://www.facebook.com/Polyamory-Rights-330835903707393/

Polyamory is shared with people who love more than one person and each person consents to whatever dynamic the relationship is.

2. Is...A commitment you make with all partners.

https://findpoly.com/blog/polyamory-definitions/

You shouldn't make one partner a priority over the other or another. Like any relationship, your partners need to feel important no matter how many you have.

3. Is...Communication.

https://everydaypowerblog.com/commitment-quotes/

You must discuss what you want and need from each other. If there is no communication then there is no trust between partners.

4. Is... Filled with variables.

https://tacit.livejournal.com/332839.html

Polyamory has so many variables and dynamics. It isn't always three people dating each other or one person dating multiple people. Each and every relationship is as unique as the people in it.

5. Is...Tough

https://poly-coach.com/open-relationship-therapy/the-difference-between-open-relationships-polyamory-and-swinging/

Open relationships are tough but just like any relationship, if you care for one another, effort won't seem like a chore.

1. Isn't...Cheating.

https://www.sciencealert.com/psychological-predictors-infidelity-cheating-marriage

Polyamory isn't an excuse to cheat. If any of your partners don't know about the other, then it's considered cheating.

2. Isn't...A cure for your monogamous relationship problems

https://stock.adobe.com/images/close-up-portrait-of-a-bearded-man-holding-capsule/187713340?tduid=d1414bc8cba74cd03922b054bac1260c&as_channel=affiliate&as_campclass=redirect&as_source=arvato

Polyamory isn't something you just try so you can "fix" the existing problems you have in your current relationship. Chances are you'll have the same problems just with added people in the mix.

3. Isn't...A kink.

https://stock.adobe.com/images/riding-crop-a-whip-flogger-and-blindfold-mask-on-red-satin-kinky-sex-toys-for-dom-sub-sexual-games-and-other-forms-of-kink/108187469?tduid=d1414bc8cba74cd03922b054bac1260c&as_channel=affiliate&as_campclass=redirect&as_source=arvato

Polyamory isn't a kink you try out with your significant other to "spice" up your love life. It's a real thing that is shared between loving partners.

4. Isn't...A way to prove to people that you're date-able.

https://www.whoholdsthecardsnow.com/how-to-know-if-a-guy-is-playing-you/

You shouldn't be in any relationship to prove anything to anyone. Nine times out of ten, most friends don't really care if you're dating anyone or not.

5. Isn't...A way to solve your commitment issues.

https://stock.adobe.com/images/dictionary-series-attributes-commitment/10647935?tduid=d1414bc8cba74cd03922b054bac1260c&as_channel=affiliate&as_campclass=redirect&as_source=arvato

If you have issues with commitment, then polyamory isn't for you. Polyamory isn't the same as casual dating. It's still a relationship just with more than one person so if you can't handle commitment, then I suggest steering clear from any serious relationship.

These days, most people try harder and harder to avoid getting hurt. No one wants to get their heart broken but polyamory isn't the way around that. If you're in a polyamorous relationship for the wrong reasons, you could be the one that ends up hurting someone else instead of the other way around.

Report this Content

This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.

Entertainment

25 Beatles Lyrics: Your Go-To Guide for Every Situation

The Best Lines from the Fab Four

SUNY Binghamton

32030

Wikipedia Commons

For as long as I can remember, I have been listening to The Beatles. Every year, my mom would appropriately blast “Birthday” on anyone’s birthday. I knew all of the words to “Back In The U.S.S.R” by the time I was 5 (Even though I had no idea what or where the U.S.S.R was). I grew up with John, Paul, George, and Ringo instead Justin, JC, Joey, Chris and Lance (I had to google N*SYNC to remember their names). The highlight of my short life was Paul McCartney in concert twice. I’m not someone to “fangirl” but those days I fangirled hard. The music of The Beatles has gotten me through everything. Their songs have brought me more joy, peace, and comfort. I can listen to them in any situation and find what I need. Here are the best lyrics from The Beatles for every and any occasion.

Keep Reading...Show less

best beatles lyrics

Student Life

Waitlisted for a College Class? Here's What to Do!

Dealing with the inevitable realities of college life.

Smith College

95744

college students waiting in a long line in the hallway

StableDiffusion

Course registration at college can be a big hassle and is almost never talked about. Classes you want to take fill up before you get a chance to register. You might change your mind about a class you want to take and must struggle to find another class to fit in the same time period. You also have to make sure no classes clash by time. Like I said, it's a big hassle.

This semester, I was waitlisted for two classes. Most people in this situation, especially first years, freak out because they don't know what to do. Here is what you should do when this happens.

Keep Reading...Show less

waitlisted

Recommended for you

Polyamory: 5 Things It Is And 5 Things It Isn't

Being polyamorous doesn't make you a player or easy.

1. Is...Loving and consensual.

2. Is...A commitment you make with all partners.

3. Is...Communication.

4. Is... Filled with variables.

5. Is...Tough

1. Isn't...Cheating.

2. Isn't...A cure for your monogamous relationship problems

3. Isn't...A kink.

4. Isn't...A way to prove to people that you're date-able.

5. Isn't...A way to solve your commitment issues.

Subscribe to our Newsletter

The Best Lines from the Fab Four

And in the end, the love you take is equal to the love you make

The sun is up, the sky is blue, it's beautiful and so are you

Love is old, love is new, love is all, love is you

There's nowhere you can be that isn't where you're meant to be

Life is very short, and there's no time for fussing and fighting, my friend

He say, "I know you, you know me", One thing I can tell you is you got to be free

Oh please, say to me, You'll let me be your man. And please say to me, You'll let me hold your hand

It was twenty years ago today, Sgt. Pepper taught the band to play. They've been going in and out of style, but they're guaranteed to raise a smile

Living is easy with eyes closed, misunderstanding all you see

Can you hear me? When it rains and shine, it's just a state of mind

Little darling, it's been long cold lonely winter. Little darling, it feels like years since it' s been here. Here comes the sun, Here comes the sun, and I say it's alright

We danced through the night and we held each other tight, and before too long I fell in love with her. Now, I'll never dance with another when I saw her standing there

I love you, I love you, I love you, that's all I want to say

You say you want a revolution. Well you know, we all want to change the world

All the lonely people, where do they all come from. All the lonely people, where do they all belong

Oh, I get by with a little help from my friends

Hey Jude, don't make it bad. Take a sad song and make it better

Yesterday, all my troubles seemed so far away. Now it looks as though they're here to stay. Oh, I believe in yesterday

And when the brokenhearted people, living in the world agree, there will be an answer, let it be.

And anytime you feel the pain, Hey Jude, refrain. Don't carry the world upon your shoulders

I'll give you all I got to give if you say you'll love me too. I may not have a lot to give but what I got I'll give to you. I don't care too much for money. Money can't buy me love

All you need is love, love is all you need

Whisper words of wisdom, let it be

Blackbird singing in the dead of night, Take these broken wings and learn to fly. All your life, You were only waiting for this moment to arise

Though I know I'll never lose affection, for people and things that went before. I know I'll often stop and think about them. In my life, I love you more

Obviously the best superpower.

There have been many lessons learned.

1. The importance of traditions.

2. How to be thankful for family and friends.

3. How to give back.

4. What the word "community" really means.

5. That it isn't about the destination, but the journey.

6. The consequences of making bad choices.

7. To trust people, until you have a reason not to.

8. To be welcoming and accepting of everyone.

9. How to be my own, individual person.

10. How to work for what I want.

11. How to be great at giving directions.

12. How to be humble.

13. To be well-rounded.

14. How to be great at conflict resolution.

15. The beauty of getting outside and exploring.

16. To be prepared for anything.

17. That you don't always have to do it alone.

18. How to be creative.

19. To brush off gossip.

I have never been so thankful to know you.

Dealing with the inevitable realities of college life.

Don't freak out

Email the professor

Attend the first class

Keep attending class

Have a backup plan

Remember that everything works out at the end

Trending Topics

Top Creators

Trending Stories

Best of relationships

Subscribe to Our Newsletter

Facebook Comments

Subscribe to our
Newsletter