With just weeks left until my favorite time of year, the Fairfield County Fair, I started to get excited thinking about all the people I love seeing their every year. And, I thought about those people I don't love to see. There are definitely people you don't want to be when you're at the county fair. Make sure you aren't one of them.
1. The person in the flip flops who complains about the manure
County fairs are home to livestock shows, and believe it or not, animals poop. Crazy, right? Still wanna wear flip flops? Go for it- just watch your step, and if you end up regretting it, don't say I didn't warn you.
2. Easily confused with the person annoyed because the livestock barns "smell so bad"
Refer back to first point if your so confused about the scent. If still an issue, avoid livestock barns all together.
3. The mom who has a melt down when she can't easily maneuver her double wide stroller through the hog barn on show day
I totally understand wanting to take your kids to see the animals at the fair. And most exhibitors will gladly answer your kid's questions as long as they have time. But show day is a different story, especially in the swine barn where the animals aren't on halters. Still want to stop in that day? That's fine, just be courteous of the chaos, or your 20lb toddler might get knocked over by a 200lb pig.
4. The people who can't read the complicated "don't touch" signs
I promise, no one's trying to ruin your fun, they're just trying to keep you safe. Believe it or not, even the cutest animals can bite. If an exhibitor has a note on their stall saying "Please do not pet." it's probably because they know their animal is nippy. Take it from experience, you really don't want to see what a horses bite feels like.
5. The person who tries to feed the animals
You have my word, none of these animals are starving. And if there's no feed out for them? They probably already ate it and will be more than fine until their owner feeds them again in a few hours. Besides, I can just about guarantee whatever you're eating isn't what they're used to eating, and the last thing anyone wants is a sick animal during fair week.
6. The family who doesn't know how to win or lose
Livestock families, this one's for you. Nobody likes a sore loser or a show off. Everyone wants to be Grand Champion, and it stinks when you don't do as well as you hoped, but the fair isn't the place to make a scene because you disagree with the judge. On the flip side, if you do get that Champion slap, shake hands, say thank you, and celebrate away from the barn.
7. The wash rack hog
And I'm not talking about the one that makes the bacon. I get that you want your animals looking best for the show and sale, but you aren't the only person trying to use the wash racks. This isn't like back home- you don't have all day, so wash em and move on.
8. The one who can't be found when their pens need cleaned
This is one of my biggest pet peeves. Not only is it unfair to your animals, but it makes the livestock industry as a whole look bad. If you have time to show, you have time to clean your pens.
9. The teenage PDA couple
For whatever reason, these teenagers cannot seem to keep their tongues in their own mouths. With Mom and Dad letting them loose from their sights, some of these teens try to be discrete and duck behind barns or into empty stalls. (Super awkward to walk in on for all involved.) Others don't even bother. Normally accompanied by hands in places no one wants to see them in either.
10. The one wearing the barely there shorts
Our fair is in October and we still get this, so I feel bad for my summer fair friends. I promise, no one wants to see your cheeks popping out of your barely-there Daisy Dukes as you strut down the Midway. (But bonus points if you wear them paired with cowboy boots only worn for this occasion exactly, it makes for the best people watching conversations).