The day before I moved into my dorm room at Vincennes University back in August of 2015 I was experiencing a wide range of emotions, but the one I remember most vividly was fear. I was mortified over the whole thing. I would be almost three hours away from home, away from all of my friends, and in a totally unfamiliar place around all sorts of people I don't know, a true nightmare for introverts such as myself. I remember a conversation I had with my father by my car as we were loading it up like a pack mule with belongings to take to VU the following day where I expressed to him my fear and anxiety over heading away for school and began to speak out of that fear, suggesting to back out from going to VU at all and going to the nearest school to my hometown, which is Indiana University Southeast in New Albany. The response I got from him, though it was an admonishing, was one that was loving and that communicated extremely helpful advice that has proven true in my life thus far, as I'm now almost done with my undergrad at VU.

Definitely not all of them do this, maybe not even the majority of them do, but it seems to me that many of my peers utterly reject their parents' advice and counsel when it comes to some of the most important things in life. Admittedly, when I first received these pieces of advice from my father, advice that was later heartily backed up by my mother, I was a bit skeptical about it all and didn't take it as seriously as it should have been taken, though it was momentarily encouraging. At this time in my life, I admit that I hadn't undergone near as much sanctification by the grace of God as I have now and was still pretty rebellious and recalcitrant when it came to my relationship with my parents. But they were and are great parents and were patient with me all the while, always wishing for and striving toward my greatest good. But here is some of the wisdom imparted to me by my parents before college that has heretofore proven true and very helpful.

1. You'll Meet Your Best Friends There

Now I know that the college experience isn't a positive one for everybody, and that isn't what I am going for in this article either. Some people have terrible experiences in college that haunt them for the rest of their days, so my aim here isn't to suggest that what my parents said to me is the case for everyone. Some people never attend college and have generally successful lives too that are really well-lived. But what my parents said to me here proved gloriously true. In high school I was never "one of the guys" and had friends, but none that I felt as if I could do deep life with and really feel heart-level bonds with in most respects. But in college, shortly after everything got going with classes and activities , I overcame my shyness by the grace of God and had the boldness to take the initiative to meet new people and I got plugged into VU's campus ministry, Christian Campus Fellowship, where I met people that I connect with and that love me, accept me, and hold me accountable. Though these folks are brothers and sisters in Christ indeed, our bond has gotten so close and deep that family is a fitting word to describe the relationship we have. My parents were right even though I doubted. These people are a major and foundational part of my life now and I earnestly hope I'll have these friendships for the rest of my life. Their friendship has proven to be the sweetest I've ever had, second only to the friendship I have with Christ.

2. There's Nothing For You Here at Home

Although we still live in Borden and I do generally enjoy living here, this advice proved true as well, which makes me all the more thankful that they gave me this advice and that I took it and went to VU as was originally planned. Shortly after I went to college and got acquainted with college life, every one of my friendships back home in Borden fell apart as many of my friends began to travel roads I couldn't join them on in a moral and spiritual sense. It was heartbreaking, though in some respects things have changed for some of them. Not only that, but there's isn't a great deal of opportunity for me in my home area or a great deal to hold onto apart from my family that still lives there. However, in time VU and Christian campus Fellowship there has proven to have so much richness to be treasured. There I am a leader at Christian Campus Fellowship, I have wonderful friendships that will last forever, I have a job that I love to do and never really begrudge to go to, I am surrounded by opportunity to learn and spend hours in books and in the Bible which is a valuable treasure to me, I have greater ability to pursue the things I am passionate about, and life for all that it is has been experienced in large measure. I praise God for His providence and for granting me wise parents. They were right.

3. The College Experience Will Do More For You in the Long-run

With respect to my circumstances, this couldn't be more true. I'll give two examples of how, one being occupational and the other having to do with general life lessons. Now, as I've said before in what I've wrote, my career aspirations are to be a pastor. Where there are few opportunities for me to pursue that end at home, being in Vincennes and serving at CCF have enabled me to have the ministry foundation to both do ministry and learn how to do it better and better each day, to be accessible to actively counsel fellow believers and to do evangelism, and has even rendered the opportunity to preach, which I've found to be one of the chief passions of my life. I am confident that little if any of this would be the case had I stayed at home. Finally, on a purely practical level, being away from home has forced me to own a lot for myself that, had I stayed home, I may have fallen victim to that immaturity that refuses to grow up and continues to lean totally on mom and dad. Being at college has taught me to be responsible, to be on top of things when it comes to home and vehicle maintenance, (at least as best as I can do anyway), to own my faith in a sense, to get out of bed and to class and other events at a good time, to be reasonably conservative with spending, and much more that I cannot express in words how thankful I am for. It goes to show and illustrate that obvious truth we all know deep down — that it is almost always good to have your toes stepped on for your greater good. It's been so time and time again in my own life. Probably so in your case too, reader!

Again, in all of this, I am not giving an exhortation to every reader to go to college or to purposely go away to college rather than to attend a more local institution. Rather, this has more to do with parents than it does college, at least as I intend it. As one of my favorite philosophers, Soren Kierkegaard, said, "life can only be understood backward; but it must be lived forwards." Telling this story makes me think of this quote because in it I see the sovereignty and the providence of God in working things out as He intended for me and I see the good will and determination of heart that my parents showed me in admonishing me and in encouraging me to do what they had the wisdom to see would be so very good for me. It deepens my faith and affection for Jesus and it motivates me all the more to be the sort of parent that my parents have been for me on this level. I'm confident that if more young people would lean into things like this, things very well may fare better for us millennials.