I am the only child of a single, hardworking, and overprotective mother. All of my life it has just been my mom and I, my parents divorced when I was seven but even before then it was just momma and I. As you can imagine with any nasty divorce, the main parent becomes EXTREMELY overprotective. My mom worries about me nonstop; I'm the only person that she has to worry about because I am her only kid. At times her over-protectiveness turns into her being overbearing and she knows that. She also knows that even when she goes overboard and we argue that I still love her and I know she just wants to make sure that I'm okay. About two years ago I hit the "I'm 17 mom, I'm an adult" stage. Well, now I'm 19 and it still hasn't hit her that her little kid is a big kid now.
Before I really start this, let me just say that my mom loves me and always does everything to take care of me. Mom and I laugh, cry, fight, and sit in silence together. She's my PIC (partner in crime) and I wouldn't want another one to take her place. Even though I'm 19 now, I still have to ask my mom for permission to do some things. Yes, this is a thing that I'm sure any parent reading it would agree with. However kids, are ya with me? Sometimes I hate having to ask her for permission because I know that I'm not going to get the answer that I want or I'm going to have to answer a lot of questions before I can do the thing that I want. Again, I know I'm her only thing and that she does this because she loves me and I don't blame her. I worry about my mom constantly just like she does me.
After thinking about how and when to ask my mom, I finally asked her a week in advance if I could go to Knoxville, TN by myself to see a girl. That sentence has so many red flags in it. I have never been to Knoxville, nor to Tennessee; this was an immediate concern of hers. The drive is about four hours and some change and that made her worry instantly even though my drive home to see her is an hour less. Going alone to a place I have never been before scared my mom because what if I "ended up dead in a ditch somewhere". Lastly, going to see a girl was not high on mom's priority list. I could have gone home to see my family instead, and she is right.
My mom contemplated my trip a lot. I also asked her if I could go a day early and she thought about it a lot and finally said yes. The one condition was that I turn on my location services so she could see where I was and if I did end up dead in a ditch, she knew which one to dig me out of. I agreed and departed on my four hour trip Thursday around lunch. I'm sure that my mom was freaking out the entire time, but once I got to Knoxville she could breath easy and so could I.
I was looking forward to this trip so much. The girl I was going to see is in Knoxville for Grad School and is someone that really matters to me. Even though she is not my partner (we're not dating mom!), Ciara is someone that I want in my life and that makes me really happy and safe feeling. Ciara and I spent most of the summer together before she moved and I promised her that I would go see her once she moved. At the time of that promise, I didn't really know how my mom would feel about it for several reasons, but the biggest one being because she is a girl that I like.
Momma Grace is overprotective, I have already said that. But Momma Grace hasn't liked anyone that I have dated before. My last real girlfriend was someone that mom felt was not right for me and she made that clear during and after our relationship. I have never really dated someone that my mom liked. My mom liking the person that I'm with is really important to me because she matters to me and if I have someone in my life as a partner, I want them to get along with my mom.
My mom loves Ciara. She loves her and she hasn't even met her yet. The whole time I was in Knoxville, they were texting each other and would talk on the phone when I was talking to my mom. Several times mom told me that she could tell that I was happy and at peace with Ciara. Once she even said that she had a good feeling about Ciara that she hasn't had about others.
Hearing my mom talk about Ciara the way she does makes me even happier with Ciara. I feel like I don't have to worry about if they will get along or not or if one of them is going to say something negative about the other to me. I have never felt the way that I do right now. Granted, I have not had a lot of relationships but the ones that I have, my mom hasn't liked the person or had a bad feeling about our relationship. I see so many heterosexual couples who have such a close relationship with the their partners family and I have always wanted that. My mom finally accepts the person that I'm not with, but the person that I care about. They are both so excited to meet each other and I'm really excited for that moment too.
I know that my mom may not let me go to Knoxville that often in the future, but I do know that she really likes Ciara. The feeling of my mom liking the person that I like is such an amazing feeling. I already knew that Ciara was a great person and that she was genuine, I just had to let my mom see it. I'll always be thankful for this feeling and to my mom for letting me go to Knoxville. Had I not gone to Knoxville, mom might not have realized the person that I like is this amazing.