Whoever said that "high school is the best for years of your life," is a liar. Life is so much more than high school football games on a Friday night, going to the mall with your friends, and pointless drama.
Coming back to my childhood home is probably the hardest thing I've ever done. I feel disconnected to who I really am because I've been bored in reality. I get that summer is suppose to be this time to relax, but all I've wanted is to go back to my life at college and be with my friends there.
Maybe to an extent, I was never meant to be friends with a majority of the people from my high school. However, it is kind of hard not to when you see these people five days of your week for seven hours. You are kind of forced to make due with what you got since we do not get a choice of where we go to high school, most of the time.
I always felt like an outsider. My town is a close knit community where everyone knows each other. I only moved to my hometown when I was 6 years old, but I did not start attending the public high school until eighth grade. I was then pushed into the Honors classes going into freshman year of high school, so I was already closed off to most of my class since I joined the smart kids club. Neither of my parents went to my high school, I am an only child, so I was a mystery for what seemed like the longest time.
Looking back on it, I outgrew my high school junior year, so even before I graduated. Like any other small town kid, I was ready for excitement and adventured. I was finally about to choose where I go to college, and I was determined to get as far away as possible.
It was tough my first semester of college to see my classmates still meeting up with each other on the weekends. I kind of felt like I hadn't found a place to call my own on my college campus, so I did ache to go back to what I was familiar with. I wanted to runaway from college and go back to the life I knew because it was easy.
To put more context to the circumstances, many of my classmates stayed local. They went to colleges approximately 30 minutes to an hour away from each other. They went to each other's colleges and went back home often. Maybe I was afraid of missing out and not giving Temple the chance to be this wonderful new start? Maybe I was refusing to see all the wonderful things my college had to offer, so I was refusing to even pursing them because I wanted to go back home.
It took up until my second semester to finally feel like Temple was my home. I felt myself growing further from my hometown, and that's what I always wanted. Sure, I would always feel connected there because that's where my parents are. Home really for me now is North Philadelphia and wherever my parents are.
My high school "friends" are still within their same cliches or meeting with people who did, at one point, attend our high school, and that's okay. However, that is not who I am anymore. I've changed from the person I was even over a year ago, so yes, I am an outsider to my high school friends and I did outgrow them. That's all okay because I know I'm happier with the life I live now and have friends who do care about me. They just happen to still be either in Philadelphia or live out of the state.
I will always be grateful for the friendships I did form in high school, and only wish the best for them. We're just all growing up and it's time I fully move on to this new exciting chapter of my life since my life is no longer in New Castle, Pennsylvania.