To The One Who Walked Away From Me

To The One Who Walked Away From Me

Just a few things you should know.
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You said goodbye, and that's fair. It's your decision.

You should know I respect your decision regardless of how much I don't understand it.

I am hurt yes, very hurt and you probably know that and that doesn't change a thing, which really really sucks to think about.

You should know I am not sad 24-7,the thought of us being together and the good old days kind of off-set me, but I am still living my life and going through my daily routine just fine, and getting better day by day.

Every now and then I see something that reminds me of you, or I remember something about us like an inside joke, and I want to tell you about it so we can laugh about it just like good old times and be the funny goofy people that we were, but then I remember I can't.

Things are different now, they are weird. We have to be honest — it's weird going from talking to each other every day to now never speaking. It's weird not seeing each other and it's weird that our daily routines have changed solely because of our relationship status. It's weird that it has to be like this, in my opinion, it doesn’t, but I know it's probably for the best.

You should know the image of us is harder for me to just "erase." I could delete the pictures of us and pretend like we never happened, but I can't. The pictures we took hold special memories to me and I know they did to you too. There's no reason to try to forget about something that once made you happy. There're pictures in my mind of us too, and how we were and how I thought it all was supposed to be, the happy times, the times in that moment when I thought there was no greater feeling than that undeniable bond we had.

I wish I had a better explanation of why things had to end and you owe me that, but I've come to terms that I'll probably never get that. Just know the way it ended was pretty selfish of you, I know it and you should too. One day you'll realize it but I won't need an explanation then.

You should know you're stupid for walking away. I forgave you for so much, I let you put me through hurt because I knew how we used to be and I didn't want to lose you or the special relationship we once had. I let you into my life and showed you all of my flaws and let you know all of my secrets. We got to know each other on a level no one else has seen us before, and that took a lot out of me but now it's all over and we have to act like those things never happened.

You should know that I don't stop thinking about you and I want nothing but the best for you. I know I don’t get to hear about what goes on in your life, but I wish I could. I wish I could hear you're doing good, you should know I hope you are.

You should know just because it's over doesn’t mean we have to hate each other. I know we may never talk again and that's your preference. We may hear things about each other that we don’t want to hear, they may hurt. But regardless of anything, I would love to still be somewhat a part of your life, because you meant a lot to me. If you ever did feel like reaching out to me again know I would be here, if anything just to listen. We've been through it all and I would go through it all again just to be there for you.

You should know one day we'll both look back at this all and find some sort of peace or lesson of why this all had to happen, but for now, thanks for giving me the good times and thanks for giving me a reason to see there will be better times.


Goodbye!

Cover Image Credit: Sierra Gardner

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Why Girls Love The Dad Bod

If your man can rock the dad bod, he's a keeper.

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In case you haven't noticed lately, girls are all about that dad bod.

Girls have been dealing with body image issues since the beginning of time until recent (for those of you who consider yourselves to be "Thick thin") I hadn't heard about this body type until my roommate mentioned it. She used to be crazy over guys she claimed had the dad bod.

After observing the guys she found attractive, I came to understand this body type well and was able to identify it. The dad bod is a nice balance between a beer gut and working out. The dad bod says, "I go to the gym occasionally, but I also drink heavily on the weekends and enjoy eating eight slices of pizza at a time." It's not an overweight guy, but it isn't one with washboard abs, either.

The dad bod is a new trend and fraternity boys everywhere seem to be rejoicing. Turns out skipping the gym for a few brews last Thursday after class turned out to be in their favor. While we all love a sculpted guy, there is just something about the dad bod that makes boys seem more human, natural, and attractive. Here are a few reasons that girls are crazy about the dad bod.

It doesn't intimidate us.
Few things are worse than taking a picture in a bathing suit, one being taking a picture in a bathing suit with a guy who is crazy fit. We don't want a guy that makes us feel insecure about our body. We are insecure enough as it is. We don't need a perfectly sculpted guy standing next to us to make us feel worse.

SEE ALSO: Slim Thick Is The New Thin

We like being the pretty one.
We love people saying "they look cute together." But we still like being the center of attention. We want to look skinny and the bigger the guy, the smaller we feel and the better we look next to you in a picture.

Better cuddling.
No one wants to cuddle with a rock. Or Edward Cullen. The end.

Good eats.
The dad bod says he doesn't meal prep every Sunday night so if you want to go to Taco Tuesday or $4 pitcher Wednesday, he'd be totally down. He's not scared of a cheat meal because he eats just about anything and everything.

You know what you're getting.
Girls tend to picture their future together with their guys early on. Therefore, if he already has the dad bod going on, we can get used to it before we date him, marry him, have three kids. We know what we are getting into when he's got the same exact body type at the age of 22 that he's going to have at 45.


So there you go. A simple break down of why girls everywhere are going nuts over this body type on males. We like it. We love it. We want some more of it. So here's to you dad bods, keep it up. Men, confidently strut that gut on the beach because while you stare at us in our bikinis we will be staring just as hard.

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11 Pieces Of Advice That Will Change The Way You Love And Let Go

Through love and loss, there is always a lesson to be had.

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Asking for advice can be tough, especially when it comes to relationship advice. Over the past few years, I have experienced a lot of love and loss. I've accumulated a ton of stellar advice from those around me. Through makeups, breakups, dating and leaving, there is so much to be learned about the way we can all improve our relationships.

1. Love is not enough to make a relationship work.

The first piece of advice I will share is actually something I wrote about here.

"Love is not enough to make a relationship work." This is something no one ever told me, but it's something I have realized. Some people think that love can conquer anything, but that can be a toxic concept.

There is so much more that is needed in a relationship other than love.

Yes, you need love to thrive in relationships. But you also need mutual respect, trust, boundaries and security. If you are missing one or more of those things and only have love, that is toxic. If you love someone but are not being treated well, it is NOT enough.

2. You cannot compare relationships.

This has been crucial advice for me this year, given to me by my best friend.

You are going to have multiple relationships and friendships throughout your life. These relationships are always going to be different, even if you think you are the same.

In reality, every relationship has a different love language. In every relationship, you're going to experience different hardships and successes.

You are going to experience so many different types of relationships. Comparing and chasing after one specific moment or one specific feeling you once had will ultimately ruin what you have in the present.

3. One day, you just know.

This piece of advice was given to me by none other than my mom.

"One day, you just know" is the phrase my mom uses when someone is thinking about pushing a relationship forward or ultimately ending things.

I was having a hard time coming to terms with my feelings at the beginning of my freshman year. I wasn't sure whether or not I should continue a relationship or end things. I loved someone, but I no longer knew if I was in love with them.

So my mom told me during those confusing few days that one day I would just know that it was the end. That one day I was just going to wake up and realize I no longer wanted to continue that particular relationship.

She was right. After days of going back and forth in my head, I knew it was just time and that is all it took.

4. Date someone who is kind.

I know this piece of advice is a no-brainer.

I get it. Obviously, you want to date someone who is kind. But there is more to it than that.

From what I have noticed, it is the men and women who actively prove their kindness that make the best partners. These are the people who are not only kind to you but to others as well.

They are kind to friends, families, cashiers, customer service workers and more.

The way they treat others in public and in private are huge indicators as to whether or not you will get that same respect in return.

5. If you cry more than you laugh, you have to let them go.

Another lovely piece of advice from my mom.

Every relationship has its ups and downs, successes and downfalls. However, it is important to note that while this is true, you cannot rationalize being in a relationship that makes you feel miserable.

Some days or months are going to be harder than others. Being persistently sad, angry or unhappy is another story though.

My mom always said that if you cry more than you laugh in a relationship, maybe it is no longer the time to be with that person. The person you are with should uplift you and be someone you have a good time with - not someone who makes you cry more often than not.

6. "We accept the love we think we deserve."

From the wise words of "The Perks Of Being A Wallflower," "We accept the love we think we deserve."

I have seen countless relationships, movies and shows that depict this lesson.

I feel as though people will often stay in relationships because they are "settling," or because they think it is the best they can do. This is a direct reflection of themselves.

If you love someone and they do not give you the affection you want, you begin to believe you do not deserve that affection. You're not doing enough in your mind.

If you love someone and they hurt you, you continue letting it happen. You rationalize that behavior.

Put yourself on a pedestal. You deserve to be loved properly.

7. Just because you lose someone, that does not mean it is a loss.

I have experienced this myself. I truly had a fun time with this one boy I met at school. We were best friends and hung out all the time. We spent every day together. I really liked him, and he liked me back. We were inseparable.

The downfall was the fact that we were never on the same page. He distracted me from my studies. His goals didn't align with mine.

These downfalls of the relationship caused me so much stress and so many nights without sleep that I ended things. Ending things felt like the end of an era. I was losing my best friend, but I came to realize that it really is no loss.

It is not a loss because I gained so much more. When I finally let that stress go, I gained a sense of independence, confidence and security within myself and my studies.

8. A little goes a long way.

One of the major keys in a relationship is appreciating the little things.

It is not always about anniversaries, dates and flaunting your relationship on social media. Sometimes it is just them sending you something online and saying it reminded them of you. It's having them continue to open the door for you or even creating inside jokes with them.

Sometimes we like to make it seem like our relationships are these extravagant, out of this world experiences. But really, it is just two people who share a love for one another. Be generous to them with your time, your care and your efforts.

It's not about the recognition or the material things.

9. Loyalty is a necessity, not a luxury.

It's as simple as this: Being committed to one person you love is easy. If it's not easy, it's not love!

You shouldn't have to fight for someone to stay loyal and devoted to you. You should expect it and get it with no ifs, ands or buts.

10. Communication is key.

We have all heard this a thousand times. Communication is pivotal. From talking about your day all the way to talking about your deepest feelings. Holding things back holds a relationship back.

It is important to talk to each other and to become comfortable when it comes to everything you guys find it important to talk about.

It is equally as important to listen to each other too. You should make it a point to listen to your significant other, to understand them, not just to respond to them.

11. Have mutual trust, respect and boundaries

These concepts all go hand and hand.

It is extremely important to trust your partner with your whole existence. You should trust them to be respectful, loyal and to make sure they are doing their best to uphold the values of your relationship.

That trust also needs to be reciprocated. If one person does not trust the other, feelings of jealousy and resentment will become apparent in the relationship.

Finally, you should trust and respect your partner's boundaries. You should use safe words and talk about what you do not want to see in the relationship dynamic, what you consider cheating and so on.

There should be no place for dishonesty or disrespect within a unit.

Cover Image Credit:

https://www.pexels.com/photo/adults-affection-blur-casual-323148/

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