Dear Lost Girl,

This is going to sound terribly cheesy, but I was once you. I was once that high school girl who hid certain interests, or worse, pretended to be interested in things I couldn't care less about for the affirmation of my peers. I was once that girl who was afraid of letting others know how much I loved Harry Potter or old-school rock bands for the fear of seeming like someone undesirable to my classmates. I was afraid of letting others see my real interests. If I allowed them to see me for who I truly was, they might call me weird. Even worse than being called weird: a poser. What was I supposed to do if someone thought I was fake for genuinely liking the things I did? My insecurities once ran deep.

Now that I'm a sophomore in college with friends who nerd-out over the same things as myself, it's hard for me to believe I was ever the type of person to hide things about myself that genuinely make me who I am or that I allowed myself to be active in friendships with people who knew little to none of the 'real me'. This is not to say I don't look back and value the times I spent with people along the way. I was simply finding myself, as I am sure they were, too.

Growing up in a small town of around 1,300 people, everyone knew you -- or at least they thought they did. The pressure of fitting a mold everyone expected you to fit was often daunting. It's normal to change the way you think about certain things as you grow older. As you gradually experience life and all the situations that come along with it, you gain a new outlook on many different things and often find that you have taken a liking to things you hadn't before, or maybe dislike things you once thought you loved. When you attend a small high school, however, it is sometimes difficult to allow yourself to transform into the person you wish to become for fear of others' judgments. If I were to one day wake up and decide I would suddenly tell everyone I was a huge Nirvana fan, and had been since I stumbled across their music during an MTV special when I was 12, they would have all thought I was going through a phase. I just didn't know anyone else who liked Nirvana, and the last thing I wanted was to make people think I was copying someone. So I kept it to myself. Sometimes it just seemed easier to stay in the mold I was assigned.

Sadly, because of my attitude for most of high school, I missed out on some great experiences. Even though I was from a small town, I might have possibly connected with someone who secretly liked the same things I did. I'll never know. I was so busy worrying about what others thought of me, I wasn't listening to who I was trying to be. How can someone ever find out who they really are as a person if they never listen to themselves?

I no longer live in the town I attended high school in, and I often find it hard to connect with the people I once did in that town. I am no longer insecure about the things I enjoy. And as a soon-to-be 20 year old, I realize you do not have to fit a singular personality mold. To put things in Harry Potter terms: I identify most with the Slytherin house, although I often show traits of Gryffindor, as well. I even resemble a Ravenclaw from time to time. People I attended high school with might think I have changed or that I am not the person I once was. My response is simply that I found myself. As I write this article, it occurs to me that my high school best friend or even my own mother might not have a clue how borderline-obsessive I am about Kurt Cobain and Dave Grohl. It wasn't until recently, cruising town after dark with a friend I became close to second semester, that I realized someone else might love Foo Fighters, too, and that my interest in them was completely valid. My inner Lost Girl smiled at the realization that I no longer had to validate my preferred music to others. I like what I like and don't what I don't.

The person I am today knows that you can be a total science nerd and still feel like Lithium speaks to you on a personal level. It's more than fine to read Edgar Allan Poe in your spare time (even if you don't completely understand it all) and watch Royals and Chiefs games with your brothers, too. As people, we are not one-dimensional. There are so many millions upon trillions of things that make us the people we are. And you should NEVER be afraid to express them. If someone questions you for the things you like, so what? And if you're experimenting with different types of personal styles, who cares? And, girl, don't you ever let anyone call you 'basic' for liking Starbucks and Justin Bieber if that happens to be your thing. Or if you still don't understand the hype behind the Kardashian/Jenner family? That's fine, too.

If anyone questions you for being the you of the moment, just tell them you're busy finding yourself. And believe me, once you do, it's amazing.

Sincerely,

Found Girl