When you came to visit during summer break, all my other friends from home didn't seem to like you. They all said they hated your attitude and how you talked to them. They told me that you seemed too possessive and that I should stop being friends with you. I didn't listen to them; looking back, maybe I should have listened.
This is an open letter to the friend who abused me.
The first time we hung out together it was a good time, watching musicals and eating junk food in your dorm room; we found out we had more common interests than I thought. After that, we were hanging out any chance we got when we weren't in class or one of the school clubs. I still remember all the rehearsals when we did stage crew together, spending hours getting ready for the school formals, making late night food runs when we couldn't sleep or get work done. Everything seemed okay.
Then I discovered your flaws. It was no big deal after all everyone has flaws; nobody's perfect. Everyone else seemed to notice them too. So you had a temper, and you were stubborn, but you did not take it out on me all the time. The others were more open to show that they had a problem with it. I could tell that it bothered you a lot, so I didn't leave your side, and I even stood up for you. Looking back now, I guess this was when all the trouble started.
You wanted to hang out every possible minute; there was always an excuse to want to hang out. It was starting to get overwhelming. We still had separate interests, and sometimes I just wanted to focus on those. It wasn't that I wanted to stop hanging out with you; I just needed to do my own thing. You didn't let it slide when I started making new friends either; you always felt the need to be included. You'd invite yourself every chance you got, even when you had no right. It's not all about you, why didn't I say no; was I that weak? When I did say no it turned into an argument; there was screaming, cursing, and insults, any negative word or phrase we could think of we said. Finally, when we could say no more, the doors would be slammed and the crying and the silence between each other grew. When it seemed like there was no turning back, you thought you could make it up to me with just a simple sorry or the promise of something that interested me, like food or a trip to the mall. I guess I thought it was enough because I forgave you every time. I didn't see how possessive you were and that you were breaking me each time I forgave you.
After a few years though, it became enough. We were both under enough stress as it was that year, but you took it all out on me. I knew that we were arguing more frequently, but then you brought other close friends into it, and that is where I drew the line. I finally saw that you'd been emotionally abusive and toxic to me all this time. It took you hurting others for me to see it. Shame on me for letting it come to something like that, and shame on you for doing that.
That's in the past now. We're not friends anymore; I can forgive you for what you did but I can never forget it, and that's what hurts the most. I'll admit that I miss a lot of the good times we did have, but it will never make up for how you treated me. I have nothing to gain by hating you, though sometimes I want to. I cannot waste the energy any longer. What you did broke me for a little while, but I came out of it stronger and more confident in myself. All I can do is wish you well, and hope that you have learned a lesson. Hopefully, you won't do the same thing to someone else.