Older Siblings, What You Say And Do Has An Effect
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Relationships

Older Siblings, What You Say And Do Has An Effect

Choose to love on your younger siblings, the outcome is so much more rewarding.

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Older Siblings, What You Say And Do Has An Effect
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All siblings fight.

It doesn't matter if they're the same gender or age as you or not, you are bound to fight. Clashing personalities, shared bathrooms, "borrowed" clothes and toys, it happens to almost everyone with a sibling.

I have been able to have a different outlook on this topic lately though as I have finally passed from the stage of constant fighting to a mutual understanding with my brother.

The two of us are eight and a half years apart so I had a hand in helping out when he was a baby as I was older and was able to change some diapers or give a bath here and there once he got a little older. However, this responsibility developed a sense of bossiness in me when it came to him.

I always wanted to be right. I liked being in charge and telling him what to do. What older sibling doesn't? I would get annoyed when I was busy and he bothered me. I told him to get out of my room when I didn't want him in there, which was pretty much always. I would basically manipulate him wanting to be around me to get him to do stuff for me. I never realized or saw the negative effects of my behavior until later on in our time together.

He used to get so excited when I was going to be in charge of babysitting him for the night when our parents would go out. He would want to play board games, watch a movie, take a bubble bath, all the cool stuff he didn't get to do as often because life was busy. I would do those things with him at first, but slowly as the years went by babysitting felt like more of a chore than quality time so I neglected the time that I was given and stayed in my room most of the time and left him to play by himself until I had to put him to bed.

It wasn't until one day my mom mentioned to me that he didn't like it when I babysat him anymore that I really started to see the consequences of my actions. The bright-eyed little boy who wanted nothing more than to spend quality time with his big sister who he thought was the coolest person in the world, was crushed because she never wanted to spend any time with him.

It was then that I decided to do my best to change my actions. I spent more time with him, found common interests, made forts, was more lenient than bossy, and our relationship got better.

Now that I am away at college he misses me so much when I'm gone and he hugs me a little tighter and a little longer than anyone else does when I come home to visit.

I know that being a bossy older sibling is almost inevitable. I see him doing it now with our youngest brother from time to time. It happens, it's in our nature, but it doesn't have to be how we choose to act.

Older siblings, take it from a girl in college who spent the duration of the time writing this article in tears because of how she treated her brother when she was younger and who wishes she could take it all back, what you say and do does have an impact. Chose your battles. Don't sweat the small stuff. Chances are your younger siblings are annoying you because they think you are the coolest person in the whole world and they want nothing more than to be just like you when they grow up.

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
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