Pro sand Cons of being the oldest sibling

7 Pros And Cons of Being The Older Sibling

We wouldn't trade being the oldest for the world- but there are definitely pros AND cons to being the oldest sibling.

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My parents have two children: me (18yo) and my little brother (15.5 yo) so I have experienced being the oldest ever since I was 2.5. Over my time growing up with my little brother, I have noticed these seven aspects about myself and my relationship with my brother and parents. I love my little brother so much and all of these aspects definitely have their pros but not a day goes by where I don't also feel the cons.

1. You get your license first.

I first got my license in June of 2016, and with relatively new laws in place, I was not allowed to drive anyone else (under 18) for a year, with the exception of my younger brother. My brother is still fifteen so he doesn't have his license yet which means I have been driving him around for two years now.

Overall Pro: You have the license and therefore some power, after all, if they are too mean to you, who will take them to their friend across town?

Overall Con: Your newfound freedom is immediately limited when instead of driving whenever/wherever you want, you still have to be back in town by 3 to take your sib to soccer practice.

2. You have a 'blank slate' in school.

I've always been able to forge my own path in school. No teacher has ever had preconceived ideas about me or my abilities based on an older sibling. Although, several of my teachers in high school did have my mom (that's a story for another time though).

Overall Pro: You don't have to work extra hard to prove yourself against the slacker reputation of another sibling or feel pressure to live up to extremely high expectations by an overachieving sibling.

Overall Con: No one knows you, it's completely up to you to foster impressions and relationships that will affect you and possibly your younger sibling - it can be a bit overwhelming.

3. You have less hand-me downs.

Well, this wasn't an issue for my little brother in the clothes department but he still had my hand me down toys, textbooks, blankets, etc. Don't get me wrong I used plenty of hand me downs from older cousins and family friends but for the most part, older siblings, myself included, normally get more new things than the younger one simply because the family did not have the supplies yet.

Overall Pro: You get the newest things!

Overall Con: You end sharing with your sibling or having less because your parents had to spend more money on the new equipment.

4. Your parents tried harder to be the model parent with you.

My parents put in the effort with both my brother and I but they definitely tried harder to follow everything by the book with me than with him. Some examples are types of food, later bedtimes, types of shows, types of music, etc.

Overall Pro: Every recommendation for child growth and development was followed to a T for you.

Overall Con: You have to sit and watch your younger sibling watch shows at 9yo that you weren't allowed to watch until you were 12.

5. You parents view you as more responsible ( most of the time).

Just by virtue of being older, your parents view you as more responsible. The only other children your parents have are younger and therefore you seem more mature and responsible by comparison. This view gives you more privileges and more responsibilities.

Overall Pro: You get privileges such as staying home alone first, going out without parents, getting a pet, etc.

Overall Con: You get more responsibilities such as household chores, being a built in babysitter and source of entertainment for your younger sibling.

6.You get the bigger bedroom.

I know some siblings share rooms but my brother and I each have our own room. When we first moved to the house we are in now, I was older ( I still am, obviously), and bigger, so therefore I had accumulated more things so naturally, I got the larger room. It was fine when we were younger but now that my little brother is bigger (a good 5 inches taller than me) he harbors a little resentment for the difference in room size.

Overall Pro: Pretty simple, you have the bigger room and therefore more space.

Overall Con: You live in constant fear that your younger sibling will steal your room while you're away at college.

7. You get to be in charge.

Being the older child meant that when I reached a certain age my parents would go out and no longer feel the need to hire a sitter or drop us off with our grandparents because I could be "in charge" for various amounts of time. When you first started staying home alone with your sibling, they were probably young enough that they listened to you because mom and dad said too. After a while, however, they realized that mom and ad weren't there and so they started to challenge you, knowing you had no real power as you probably wouldn't complain too much because you wanted your parents to trust you home alone.

Overall Pro: You get to be the boss and mom and dad actually want you too.

Overall Con: Even if you don't touch a thing, but your younger sibling does, you will still be blamed because "you were in charge

I love my little brother so much and I know we will miss each other while I'm at college on the other side of the country. That being said, sibling relationships are hard, as you come from the same place but try o hard to be different. There are certainly days where the cons of being the oldest outweigh the pros, but there are also times when the pros outweigh the cons. Sibling relationships are a constant give and take, but a deep love and bond nevertheless. I'll always be here for my brother, and as for now, I'm patiently waiting for the day when he reimburses all the gas money I've spent on him.

Cover Image Credit:

Kim Kardashian-West

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To The Grandmothers Who Made Us The Women We Are Today

Sincerely, the loving granddaughters.
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The relationship between a grandmother and her granddaughter is something so uniquely special and something to be treasured forever.

Your grandma loves you like you are her own daughter and adores you no matter what. She is the first person you run to when you have a problem with your parents and she never fails to grace you with the most comforting advice.

She may be guilty of spoiling you rotten but still makes sure to stress the importance of being thankful and kind.

Your grandma has most likely lived through every obstacle that you are experiencing now as a young adult and always knows just exactly what to say.

She grew up in another generation where things were probably much harder for young women than they are today.

She is a walking example of perseverance, strength, and grace who you aim to be like someday.

Your grandma teaches you the lessons she had to learn the hard way because she does not want you to make the same mistakes she did when she was growing up.

Her hugs never fail to warm your heart, her smile never fails to make you smile, and her laugh never fails to brighten your day.

She inspires you to be the best version of yourself that you can be.

You only hope that one day you can be the mother and grandmother she was to you.

A piece of girl’s heart will forever belong to her grandma that no one could ever replace.

She is the matriarch of your family and is the glue that holds you all together.

Grandmothers play such an important role in helping their granddaughters to grow into strong, intelligent, kind women.

She teaches you how to love and how to forgive.

Without the unconditional love of your grandma, you would not be the woman you are today.

To all of the grandmothers out there, thank you for being you.

Sincerely,

the loving granddaughters

Cover Image Credit: Carlie Konuch

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Why You Should Bring Your Close Friend As Your Formal Date

Before asking that cute girl to formal think about asking a friend

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Every year since I was a junior in high school I have always looked forward to homecoming or prom. When I got to college I began to look forward to my fraternity formal. I was never concerned with what to wear or the expense of formal but rather who I was going to ask. It can be difficult to make a decision. If you ask anyone friends with me they will tell you how I am one of the most indecisive people out there. There are so many people I am friendly with or have a close relationship that it can feel difficult to make a decision. But let's look at that phrase again. You might think why does he want to bring someone who is his friend to his fraternity formal rather than someone he likes or is dating. To answer this question, some of the girls I have liked I have not been able to be the true me around and that also applies to the girls I have dated as well. I am different around my friends and I want someone to know the real me rather than me just having to pretend.

Maybe I am still experiencing the effects of a fun weekend but I have noticed that every formal or prom that I have brought a date with not only was a fun formal but interacted and connected well with my friends. That is the main thing I look for in a formal date, they need to be liked by my friends and many of them are still pretty friendly after the formal. You are spending the weekend with them and the drive down for you formal. There will be a lot of time spent with your date so it is important to bring someone you know you will have fun with. I am not saying that there isn't anything wrong with bringing someone else but I always found it best to bring a friend if you are not dating someone.

Think about the people you know you will always have fun with. This can be an indication of who you should bring and why but you should also think about the positives in this situation. Your fun and the time spent with the people should be prioritized before anything else. This event is about you and you should have someone with you that you know is fun to be around and someone you can enjoy yourself around along with your friends. Friends know you as well as you know yourself so there is not an idea of having to pretend to be someone else. The good thing about friends is that you do not run out of things to talk about and there is always something new to learn. Take your formal as a trip that you get to experience with the people closest to you. That is my take.

The key for me is to know that I will have fun with my date at formal. The drive to formal can be long and you are sharing a hotel room with your date along with spending time with them during the trip. I talk a lot. I want someone I know who I can carry a conversation with and will not just respond with words such as Yeah or Sounds good. I have always been able to remember not only my formals but specific parts of it as well. I think this is possible because of who I have brought and the memories I made with them.

Formals are important to everyone so think about who you want to spend that moment with. There is nothing wrong with bringing someone who you like but there also is nothing wrong with bringing a friend. Some people might bring someone they are dating but you should not have to compare yourself to other people. Do what makes you happy but remember this weekend is about you and you deserve to bring someone you will have fun with.

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