Ah, sweet fourteen. Looking back, I can remember it all over again. A freshman in high school with high hopes and dreams. Wondering if prom really is like those lame 80’s movies that you were forced to watch on ABC family when nothing else was on. Preplanning your outfits, the night before school, actually believing that that guy in first period cares if your eye shadow coordinates with your new cardigan. Giving yourself that hardcore pep talk in your bedroom before you ask your parents to go out with your friends solo for the first time… and then having to make a clever excuse when they shoot down any and all hopes of going anywhere. Everyone remembers it. Remembers the anxiety, the overconfidence, the number of times you screamed “It’s not fair” or “I hate you” to your parents. Remembers the sweet innocence and the thrill of starting life with just a sliver of independence. We knew it all, right?

Here are some things I wish I had known at fourteen:

The number of “best friends” you have now will change, and that’s okay. Yes, Jessica, Louise, Mary, Susie, and Ashley may be your “BFFL’s” right now, but the older you get people change. It’s not always personal. Everyone grows and sometimes it’s in different directions. It’s like they say, it’s about quality not quantity. You many not have all of those same friends in the future, but the ones who do stick around are worth the while. Even if it’s just one lucky person.

Don’t turn down any opportunity because you’re “too cool”.Again I say, the people whose opinions are incredibly important now probably will not matter in a few years. Never be afraid to take a chance given to you because you’re scared of what someone else thinks. The only opinion that matters is your own. Follow your dreams and the people who truly support you will be there. And hey, let's be honest here, you're just as cool no matter what you do.

Yes, there’s a 95% chance you’re not going to find the love of your life soon. Learn to love yourself. Chasing a hundred frogs doesn’t guarantee a prince. Don’t compromise who you are or what you believe in order to fit what that boy wants. Yes, you may think his eyes are dreamy, but is it really worth it if he’s using the same lines on every girl in your gym class? Uhm, no. (At least be a little more discrete man.) You are intelligent, beautiful and worth so much more. Love will find you, in the mean time, focus on your happiness.

It’s okay to be the overachiever. Yes, you get embarrassed when the class turns to you and goes “Well of course she blew the curve” followed promptly by the wave of eye rolls. Yes, you hesitate when the lunch table is taking about totally bombing Mrs. Johnson’s exam in fourth period before saying you bombed it too when in reality that 93 is crumpled up in the bottom of your book bag. But the reality of it is, the habits you’re creating now will help you so so much in the future. Say it with me now: Scholarships. Scholarships. Scholarships. (PS, the eye rolling never stops, but it begins to grow on you)

Your parents are right. (Insert sigh here) I can hear my mother now, “One day you’re going to say I was right all along! Just wait!” Well laugh it up Mom. What are you, psychic? Although I hate to admit it, your mom and dad were not “totally evil dictators who don’t care about your happiness” when they wouldn’t let you ride in that car with that boy. They knew he just wanted to get in your pants, although you were totally in denial and thought he was “the one”. Always remember that they’re the first two people on your team, and they will always have your back no matter what. So love them for it!

Enjoy every single second. This is the beginning of some of the best days of your life, so don’t take it for granted. Try to find the positive of every situation rather than to waste precious time things that won’t matter a week from now. Love yourself and those around you, because life is too short to tear others down. Make the most of this, because I know you don’t believe it now, but these days go by in the blink of an eye. So live it up.