You can recall the first time that you both laid eyes on each other. Instant chemistry with endless conversation that allowed you both to read each other equally. The relationship with you both started off simple, two individuals as friends who enjoyed each others company — nothing more and nothing less than that. But, in the back of your minds there were always thoughts of “what would happen if we took things to the next level?” The thought of you two together was beautiful, a match made in heaven with two people who yearned for the same love. However, there was one problem, one factor standing in the way of this love for you two, his girlfriend.

Never in a million years did you see yourself wanting a love that another woman already had. As a child, your mother raised you to be independent and never settle for someone else’s sloppy seconds. But, you didn’t see it that way. The love that this young man poured onto you was like no other and you refused to let it go that easily. You were willing to take a risk and fight for a love that you wanted. However, you were not aware that you would be the only one fighting and eventually get taken advantage of by this young man that you were so in love with.

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The tables have turned on you. You went from being that young sweet black sister to the “other woman” who was judged because people did not understand how you saw a future in someone who was less of a man. There was a change in your character, in your language, in your body and you felt it. You were lost and not in control of your own happiness because you started to live your life for that young man and not for the beautiful and independent woman that you are. This person was not you and not someone that you wanted to be introduced to. So, you let yourself free by making a choice, revealing all truths and removing yourself from the destruction.

Today, we as a people seek love within anyone, just so we can have security in our lives. We tend to ignore the signs that our so-called “lovers” present to us and create altered images of what we “think” they should be. People show us who they are all the time and it is our duty to accept that. No love should be shared between three people, for that love is not real love and only exists in a reality that has no positive outcomes. We must understand that love does not have a time limit and will never run out. There is no need to force a love upon yourself if that love is not the love that is destined for you. Love will find its way to you, on its own terms, with its own path and its own agenda, just for you.