Growing up, I never felt like I HAD to have children, no one except my grandmother forced the idea down my throat. But, I always thought it was the "normal" thing to do, get a good education, get married, and have babies. At that moment, a woman has reached her peak, ultimate success! Well according to those old ass ways of thinking.
First I will say, if you want children, that is completely fine too! Babies are adorable, children are lovely. This article isn't for you, it is more so directed to those women who feel they MUST have a baby to "fit in", and even those who think something is weird about a woman who doesn't want them.
I will never forget, I was watching my favorite talk show hosts from "The Real" discussing Jeannie Mai's divorce from her husband Freddy Harteis. Jeannie always stuck by her decision to not have children, and it was understood that Freddy supported that decision and stayed with her. Unfortunately, both parties later decided to get a divorce; Freddy eventually went on to have a child with another woman. After news broke that the two would be splitting up, viewers went nuts!
I remember being on certain blogs, and reading comments about how she should have just given him a child, she should have "compromised". I legit could not believe those ignorant, nasty things people were saying about this woman whom they never met! A woman is not obligated to do a damn thing with her body if she does not want to. Also, I was not living with this couple, I never was there to experience their downfalls. But if you go into a marriage with an understanding of THAT magnitude, changing your mind about it and leaving your spouse out in the cold is terrible in my opinion.
A compromise is wanting steak for dinner, but being okay with eating chicken if your spouse cooked it. Compromise is switching days and times you pick your child up from school. Compromise is going to counseling, even if you do not want to, but you will in order to save your marriage. A compromise IS NOT being sure that you do not want children, but if your spouse suddenly decides they want to, you need to give them one to shut them up. No, that is NOT compromised.
This world is evil, there are parents who do not love their children, some abuse them. So if ANYONE says they do not want to birth and raise a child for whatever reason, their decision should be respected! Those giving their pointless opinion probably will never pay for dentist appointments, hospital bills, braces, senior dues, prom dresses, etc. Why are people so focused on what someone else is or is not doing with THEIR body?
I am not at all taking away the power of being a mother, it's a tough job; it is something to be proud of. However, there is more to life than being pregnant raising kids. What rulebook says a woman MUST have a child in order to be fulfilled? I'm waiting... still waiting. Nothing? Oh okay.
Stop telling women what they should do with their life!