There's a quote from The Great Gatsby that resonated with me the first time I read it many years ago. It has one meaning, but it took some time to truly understand its significance.
"And I hope she'll be a fool - that's the best thing a girl can be in this world, a beautiful little fool."
When I would read my favorite book, sure, I understood why Daisy said those words. It was a different time. There were stricter traditional gender roles. It fit perfectly with the plot, etc. But I never thought I would relate to it myself.
Before my life, and family, as I knew it was fragmented, I was just as Daisy described. I was a beautiful little fool. I was sheltered to the cruelty of this world. I was ignorant to the true ugliness, heartache, and pain that life presents. I was safe. But I was naive.
Looking back at my younger self, albeit two years ago, I was a completely different person than the young woman I see in the mirror today. How much a person can change over the course of such a short time still baffles me. I'm not different now because the color and length of my hair have changed, I have more freckles or I'm living somewhere new. I've changed because I see life differently now.
My once rosy glossed eyes have been opened and can no longer be shut again. The world and sin have tainted my sight of how I view the world and how I see others. I've seen what sin does and how it destroys everything in its path. I've seen good turn bad in the blink of an eye.
I'm no longer naive. I'm not a little beautiful fool anymore.
I used to ache for things to go back to the way they used to be. I used to wish that I could go back to being that doe-eyed girl without a care in the world.
But I don't anymore.
I'm a different person than I was back then, and I'm glad because I've learned and grown so much since then. I've learned that I cannot control what changes in my life, but I can control how I respond to it all. I've learned that I have a choice! I've learned that not everything is as it seems.
I've learned that even a little fool can become a strong young woman in this world.