Nachos And Mojitos
Start writing a post
Relationships

Nachos And Mojitos

A comedic play on an intrusion that thwarts a weekly ritual with a desperation to bring back the stasis.

353
Nachos And Mojitos
Pexels

Day 4.

Two girls sitting on a couch. Snow falling heavily on the porch. One singing snow, snow go away and the other clicking the remote.

Kim

We have to go out. It’s been three days since we’ve been sitting on this couch watching Netflix.

Nina

Browsing Netflix you mean.

Kim

Whatever. Three days since we’ve been inside.

Nina

Today is Saturday. It’s our in-house movie day anyway. I don’t see why you’re complaining?

Pick a movie!

Kim

That’s when we’ve been outside the rest of the week and want to have a silent day in. But that has not been the case this week, has it? We’ve been…

Nina

Ooh! How about Bachelorette? Looks good enough to trash and make a drinking game out of it like whenever one of the girls bitches about the other, we take a shot. What do you say?

Kim

(rolls her eyes, raising her voice)

We’ve been cooped up and been inside this house for too long. Let’s just go out and have a drink. I’ll call Sam to join us, and we can have dinner.

Nina

Ooh yes, call Sam. Maybe he’ll want to drink to some bitchy girls. I mean after the weeks he’s had with Casey and Mary and that other girl (snaps her fingers), what’s her name? Tall, blonde, white, in joggers all the time. God, why am I blanking on her name? Kim, what’s her name?

Kim

Not telling you. Not telling you until you get out off that couch and start getting dressed.

Nina

You don’t know, do you? I’ll call Sam myself.

Kim

(snatching the remote from Nina’s hand)

Its Gertrude and now go!

Nina

(Not moving)

God! Who names their child Gertrude? It’s like her parents wanted her to evoke havoc wherever she goes, you know like Grrr! I’m Gertrude, I’m going to destroy you.

Kim

She named herself that.

Nina

(In a disbelieving tone)

No! What?

Kim

Yeah. Her name was Nancy. She felt it didn’t suit her personality like it didn’t have an edge and hence she gave herself that name.

Nina

And of course, Sam found that and hence her intriguing and got entangled in her web of havoc and drove him off the edge. Jesus Christ! He really needs us…

Kim

Yes. Once you lift your ass and start getting dressed. Cheesy nachos and mojitos are what will help him. Will help all of us. Now please can you…

Nina

Why don’t you get dressed? I’ll go after you, I promise.

Kim

(looks at her disbelievingly)

Fine! But once I’m done, no more excuses.

Nina

Distractions you mean.

Kim

(trailing off)

Whatever. I don’t want to see you on the couc…

(shuts the bedroom door behind her)

[Nina puts some music. Plops herself on the couch and lies down looking into her phone. She then jumps out and bangs on the bedroom door]

Nina

Kim. Come on, come on, hurry up.

Kim

(through the bedroom door)

Wow! Really? Now you decide to hurry.

Nina

I’m serious. We have to go. Let me in at least, I’ll grab my clothes and…

Kim

(opens the door, Nina barges in)

Okay, you’re finally up and literally running and so I’m not going to ruin it by asking you if you’ve gone crazy all of a sudden.

Nina

(as she picks her clothes off the hanger)

Look at my phone. Just read what I read. Then you’ll know who’s crazy

Kim

(reading her phone)

Wow! Okay. So this is bad, I agree. But what can we do about it? It’s his life. If he’s chosen to be with…

Nina

(Cuts her off)

Don’t say. Don’t say it out loud. It will make it all the more real.

Kim

You’re really over-reacting.

Nina

Right. Over-reacting. When we have to pick him off the floor and pump him with fake self-esteem when this ends, then let me see you telling that this is not our problem.

Kim

Wow! Okay. You really need that mojito.

(then laughs incessantly)

Nina

Now, what’s wrong with you?

Kim

I like Gertrude.

Nina

Okay. Now you’ve gone off your rails.

Kim

I want to thank her personally.

Nina

Are you trying to infuriate me? ‘Cause it’s working you know.

Kim

Hey! Three days you’ve been on that couch, but she finally did what I was failing miserably at. To get you to go out!

(continues laughing)

Nina

(looks at her in aghast)

I don’t even know where to start. This is not about me. Not about us. This is about Sam and how he might kill himself and how we are responsible for making sure that that doesn’t happen.

Kim

So looks like it’s just going to be the two of us at Locos. I’m texting Jesse to see if he wants to join. I’m so happy right now.

Nina

Selfish. Selfish is what you are. How can you not care that he’s on a destructive path again? Or care at least that we have to babysit him for weeks, day and night to get him back on his feet. Could you care that we have to do that? Huh?

Kim

He’s a grown man. He can make his own choices. You need to stop babying him and being his safety nest, waiting to catch him and nurse him back to health. Maybe then he’ll stop with the poor choices.

Nina

But he doesn’t get poor choices, does he? All his choices are poor in that case. It’s a deeper problem.

Kim

Exactly. And that is why shrinks are highly paid to tell people to shut their crap lives, take a deep look at it, rewind and then hit play.

Nina

You mean to start all over again.

Kim

Yes. Whatever. Okay, I look pretty. Let me just grab a scarf while you finally change.

[The doorbell rings]

Nina

Wow! Jesse is annoyingly punctual as usual. Doesn’t he get that 6 means 7? Jesus!

Kim

Wait. Did I tell him to meet us at our place? Oh well! With all your yammering I don’t even know what I texted him and the poor thing came all the way over in the snow.

[The doorbell continues to ring]

Nina

Are you going to get that?

Kim

[Gets out of the room, yelling]

Coming. Coming. We heard you already.

[The doorbell continues to ring]

[Now Nina follows Kim to open the door]

Kim

Nina! Get back in there.

[Kim opens the door. Sam comes bursting in with bags in his hand]

Sam

She’s a b****. She’s a horrible, horrible person.

Kim looks at him incredulously and Nina bursts out laughing.

Sam

What? Say something.

Nina

Okay. Why are you here?

Sam

She broke up with me. Gertrude is a b****.

Kim

Damn it!

Nina

[continues laughing]

Sam

I just want to watch a trashy movie and I brought nachos and alcohol. Let’s party.

Nina

I love it!

Kim

I give up. I miss Gertrude.

Sam

What was that?

Kim

Nothing. We’re here for you as usual.

Looks at Nina and shakes her head in exasperation while she removes her scarf.

THE END

Report this Content
This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
Student Life

Waitlisted for a College Class? Here's What to Do!

Dealing with the inevitable realities of college life.

59152
college students waiting in a long line in the hallway
StableDiffusion

Course registration at college can be a big hassle and is almost never talked about. Classes you want to take fill up before you get a chance to register. You might change your mind about a class you want to take and must struggle to find another class to fit in the same time period. You also have to make sure no classes clash by time. Like I said, it's a big hassle.

This semester, I was waitlisted for two classes. Most people in this situation, especially first years, freak out because they don't know what to do. Here is what you should do when this happens.

Keep Reading...Show less
a man and a woman sitting on the beach in front of the sunset

Whether you met your new love interest online, through mutual friends, or another way entirely, you'll definitely want to know what you're getting into. I mean, really, what's the point in entering a relationship with someone if you don't know whether or not you're compatible on a very basic level?

Consider these 21 questions to ask in the talking stage when getting to know that new guy or girl you just started talking to:

Keep Reading...Show less
Lifestyle

Challah vs. Easter Bread: A Delicious Dilemma

Is there really such a difference in Challah bread or Easter Bread?

38223
loaves of challah and easter bread stacked up aside each other, an abundance of food in baskets
StableDiffusion

Ever since I could remember, it was a treat to receive Easter Bread made by my grandmother. We would only have it once a year and the wait was excruciating. Now that my grandmother has gotten older, she has stopped baking a lot of her recipes that require a lot of hand usage--her traditional Italian baking means no machines. So for the past few years, I have missed enjoying my Easter Bread.

Keep Reading...Show less
Adulting

Unlocking Lake People's Secrets: 15 Must-Knows!

There's no other place you'd rather be in the summer.

959692
Group of joyful friends sitting in a boat
Haley Harvey

The people that spend their summers at the lake are a unique group of people.

Whether you grew up going to the lake, have only recently started going, or have only been once or twice, you know it takes a certain kind of person to be a lake person. To the long-time lake people, the lake holds a special place in your heart, no matter how dirty the water may look.

Keep Reading...Show less
Student Life

Top 10 Reasons My School Rocks!

Why I Chose a Small School Over a Big University.

196894
man in black long sleeve shirt and black pants walking on white concrete pathway

I was asked so many times why I wanted to go to a small school when a big university is so much better. Don't get me wrong, I'm sure a big university is great but I absolutely love going to a small school. I know that I miss out on big sporting events and having people actually know where it is. I can't even count how many times I've been asked where it is and I know they won't know so I just say "somewhere in the middle of Wisconsin." But, I get to know most people at my school and I know my professors very well. Not to mention, being able to walk to the other side of campus in 5 minutes at a casual walking pace. I am so happy I made the decision to go to school where I did. I love my school and these are just a few reasons why.

Keep Reading...Show less

Subscribe to Our Newsletter

Facebook Comments