Mind you, I am not an avid viewer of "The Bachelor." Quite frankly, it takes forever, and I get bored when the most climatic scene is dancing during a private concert. I always watch each season’s finale though, however. It’s the only exciting episode the series has. But, I am not here to rag on the show whatsoever. I am currently watching the finale of this past season on DVR, and I just had to express my thoughts on the whole thing...
1. There’re more commercials and scenes of the in house audience than there are of what’s his name and his gals.
2. I mean really, is three hours totally necessary? Has it always been like this? Chris must be making a ton of money these days.
3. Everyone is so attractive, what am I doing wrong?
4. For real, they all have the pick of the litter. Why don’t I look like that on a daily basis?
5. Come on, man. How can you be in love with two women?
6. One surely one of them floats your boat just a little bit more.
7. I still don’t understand how you can be ready to marry someone when they’ve been canoodling with tons of other women.
8. I don’t think I’ll ever understand this. I mean, do you even know their middle names, Ben? Doubt it.
9. Wow, JoJo’s ombre is perfect.
10. She should have won just from the ombre.
11. I wonder if ABC buys their clothes, because I would love to copy.
12. They always look so cute. And Lord knows, after not working for two months there is no way they can afford all of the adorable outfits.
13. Speaking of working, how does one tell their boss they’re going to find love on a TV show?
14. Who knows? Maybe it’s grounds for paid leave. Maybe there’s an “I’m going on 'The Bachelor' contract.”
15. I feel so bad hearing JoJo talk about how much she loves him...
16. I just want to scream at the TV and tell her to run. Run now, girlfriend!
17. My hair definitely does not look that good when it’s wet.
18. I look like a wet mop when I jump into a pool or the ocean.
19. You’re a big ole liar, dude.
20. Stop telling them what they want to hear, ya jerk! You’re leading them on!
21. Holy rings.
22. I mean, I don’t think you could go wrong, Ben.
23. Don’t cry, sweet JoJo.
24. My heart is breaking for you.
25. Work that blue dress, girl!
26. Lauren looks amazing in her dress. Can I borrow it, sometime?
27. Hmmm... I don’t think I believe it’s love.
28. But I’m still going to become emotionally invested in this episode. Yep, that’s a tear.
29. Wait, now I need to go find out if they’re actually still together.
30. Wow, they are. I have to say I honestly did not see that coming. I still want JoJo to win. Can we have a rematch?
Even though I may not be the biggest fan of the show, the finale always seems to reel me in.