It's currently fifteen minutes past midnight, I am wide awake and unable to concentrate on anything except for my heartbeat. I hear it louder than usual and feel it in multiple places on my body-thudding away to a beat. My body is exhausted, yet I am nowhere close to falling asleep.

You see, about less than an hour ago I had a panic attack, something so many people out there experience, but for me, this was a first. I have had anxiety for the past couple years, but I have never been so scared as I was on this night. It started when I laid down and closed my-ready to go to bed. As I closed my eyes, my senses began to overload; quite the opposite of what you want to happen when trying to fall asleep. It began with my heartbeat. I could feel my heart pounding, loud and fast. I felt my heart beat through my chest, my ribcage, my arm, and my neck. It felt as if my heart was one beat away from exploding. My thoughts began racing and I could not control their speed. "I'm having a heart attack", I kept thinking.

With my mind flaring, now wide awake, I began feeling tingles going down my left arm-now convinced I would have to dial 911 for myself. At this point, I was using all of my mental energy to not think about the tingles and heartbeat. All I wanted to do was go to sleep.

The sad fact was, the more I tried to convince myself to not think about it, to just shut my brain off-the more I began thinking about all of the sensations in my body that did not feel right. Minutes later, my heart rate was the highest it has been, I laid there alone, praying that these feelings would go away.

The fear began to build, and as it's affair with my thoughts reached their peak, I felt a tightness in my throat-a lump of some sort that prevented me from breathing. I immediately sprung to my feet, needing to catch my breathe one way or another. At this point, I was full panic mode, legitimately fearing for my life. So scared.

All I wanted to do was go where there were people, somewhere I felt safe. A place where help could be called, unlike my empty apartment. My body was now a combination of pain, discomfort, and fear, but nevertheless, I got dressed and hurried out my door to my car. As I began to make my way down the hallway, my legs began to twitch beneath me-making it so difficult to walk.

With my legs still twitching, and body shivering, I somehow made it to the library at my University. After I had successfully found a seat within a sea of studious students, my heartbeat began to slow down. The twitching in my body had stopped, yet I was still absolutely terrified and paranoid.

It is now 12:30 a.m. It took me fifteen minutes to write about a panic attack that lasted over an hour.

I wasn't having a heart attack after all.

Yet I am still too scared to close my eyes and fall asleep.