The term “control freak” is used so negatively that we forget that it may be a characteristic of someone’s personality. Maybe, just maybe, that is who the person is and they cannot change. And maybe it is not as bad as the term makes it out to be. This is for all my fellow control freaks out there, let the world of planning forever be in your favor.

Now I didn’t choose the control freak life, the control freak life chose me. I’m not talking about controlling human beings or guys, even though sometimes that what people refer to. For me, needing to control any situation I can, perfectly, is what it is all about. The biggest fear I have is not having the control of my life. And life happens where some things you just cannot control. I get that. But being who I am, when that happens, I have to try my best to relax and not freak out.

Anything that is in within my range of control, I control it. If I have an appointment, I get there 5 minutes earlier. If I have a task to get done like a cleaning project at work or packing, I want to do it on my own. If I have the chance to work on something by myself, I do it because I can have full control and decide how to approach the project. I volunteer to drive because I want to have control of my life and what happens to that. Stepping in a vehicle makes you at risk of any accident that may happen. If I have a chance to plan a night out or an event, I will do it. If I plan something, I have control and I can make sure the night or event is ran smoothly. And sometimes it may seem like I don’t trust anyone to do these things. Which I do and don’t. I know what I can do and I am stubborn. I trust people that they can drive me, it just settles my nerves if I do it. And same thing with planning.

A control freak, like myself, doesn’t just want to control things just because. No, they do it because it makes them calm, and relieves the stress of the unknown. When I have no control, I panic. It’s not my greatest trait to admit sometimes but I do panic. For example, the other day I had an appointment directly after work. Everything kept happening against me for making it impossible to make this appointment and all of a sudden I am pacing back and forth and freaking out. I had no control with the obstacles that came my way but with that I calm myself by having another plan ready right away. Back up plans are a control freaks best friend. There’s always a plan A, B, C… Z. And the biggest nightmare for me is witnessing a thunderstorm that can spiral into a tornado at any moment or being in an airplane where all of my control is out the window.

With the downs of the need to control, comes with the ups. I am a damn good planner and when I plan a party I cover all the details to make sure everyone has the time of their life. I am the designated driver a lot for my friends and they can let loose. And when I do decide I want to drink, I have those friends who will take over for me for that one night. I am a quick thinker and constantly thinking of a plan for when things go wrong. And I am aware of my surroundings and my safety at any given situation or environment. So if you're reading this and thinking, damn everything she listed is me to a tee, hey you are not alone! I mean I like to think I am not alone, so you should you!