There's a weird thing that happens when your friends get into serious relationships and get married or start having kids. Once you're in your twenties, it's like a flip is switched and suddenly you're expected to have your whole life figured out and together. You're supposed to make plans for a career, finish up your education, get married and have kids. But, that's not me. And that's okay.

My goal in life is not to be a mom. I didn't spend my childhood playing with baby dolls with dreams of being a mom in my future. I don't spend time with my younger sisters who are two and four, and think "wow, I can't wait to have my own kids." I stand back as my friends have kids, admire their cute babies, and the way they go from complaining about the smallest things on social media to doting over their child. And I respect that. But right now, that's not for me.

That's not to say I want to remain childless for the rest of my life or that I hate babies, because I don't. Taking care of babies is fun, but the best part is being able to give them back. I don't have to be responsible for their existence and there is a comfort in that that's hard to describe.

At 22, I am well aware that I could take care of myself. But at 22, I am also still nervous to go to the doctor's office, I like to eat junk food more than I like to cook, and I also like to think that if I want to have a drink after a long day at work without needing to take care of someone, I can. There is so much more I want to do before my life belongs to a little person, there is so much more growing up that I need to do before I raise a little human.

And that's okay.

Don't shame me for not being ready to get married or have kids. Realistically, there are so many people older than me who were not ready for marriage or kids and did it anyway. Respect that I am mature enough to understand that I can barely take care of myself, much less a child.

Don't shame me for not knowing for sure if I want kids or not. My life's purpose is not to be a mom. I feel that I made that decision before I even knew I made that decision. I first and foremost want to be a successful member of society who doesn't have to worry about living paycheck to paycheck or struggling to make ends meet. I want to look back on my life and have more to say about it than "I got married and had kids."

We live in a time where so many more doors are open for women. This isn't the 50's, so don't shame me for not wanting to be a housewife and a doting mother. I'm still finding my place in the world, let me find it before I get a baby involved.

Not knowing if or when you want children is nothing to be ashamed of. There are some people who could have and probably should have lived their whole lives without procreating. There are parents who can't take care of themselves and abuse their kids. Don't shame me for being responsible. Simply respect my decision and stop telling me how great of a mom I'll be one day.