My Christmas Story: Jesus, Choice, Doubt And Love
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My Christmas Story: Jesus, Choice, Doubt And Love

This is what Christmas means to me, at this point in my life, at 20.

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My Christmas Story: Jesus, Choice, Doubt And Love
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Jesus.

A lot of people throw jokes and talk about Jesus around, even believers. Not necessarily in a bad way— I think many people, believers and nonbelievers alike, look up to Jesus, and his name is so commonly known throughout much of the world, he has become a sort of icon across belief systems and cultures. He was a stand-up dude. He made love and kindness cool.

But for Christmas, we need to look towards the deeper Jesus. Deeper than the little baby doll or movie representations, deeper than the memorabilia and the memes.

Driving on a quiet Denver street the night after I got back from school, I saw a sign, stark red lights against the dark night: “Keep Christ in Christmas.”

Perhaps some people would laugh this off. It has become a highly commercialized, materialistic holiday, and I understand that not everyone believes. I think Christmas is a magical time for a lot of people, despite their faith. And I’m not here to force my beliefs on anyone. But this is my story of Jesus, a story I would like to share with you this Christmas. Stick with me, I just want to share one thing.

The heart of the matter— of Christmas— is the belief that there is a God of the Universe who so loved his people, his creation, that he decided to step foot onto the earth as a human. Think about that, really, actually think about that.

A Creator of the Galaxies, of your beating heart, and of all that lays beyond chose to become a human being. Even though human life on earth is not glamorous, or easy in any definition. Existence as a human carries with it immense pain, challenge, suffering, as well as beauty and laughter and goodness. No matter who you are, nevertheless, life is not easy. The world was and continued to be plagued by war, famine, poverty, disease, corruption, pain.

Yet the God incarnate in Christ, all-powerful and capable of absolutely anything, made a choice. This God, Yahweh, could have done whatever he pleased. Could have remained outside his creation. Could have changed the world as we know it in the blink of an eye with the flick of a divine wrist. Could have done absolutely anything, things beyond our comprehension.

And this God chose the unthinkable, the incomprehensible— to walk among his creation, to be in the flesh amongst a groaning and falling humanity.

This is the God of Christianity. This is my God. This is the Savior. When I am face to face with Jesus, I do not see a deity who is out of reach, who is too big for his people, who condemns.

I see blinding love, a morning star so bright, all darkness runs away in fear. I see humility. I see willingness. I see the ultimate display of forgiveness, salvation, and redemption, in the stunning act of entering humanity in order to show us his great love for us.

If love is shown through action, Jesus is its epitome. The most loving acts of all history, of all time, are embodied in his willingness to, in total humility, become one with us, and to bear every single one of our burdens. Every single one. For each of us.

It is one of my greatest desires that the humanity I love so deeply would know this Jesus, and know this love. It knocks every shadow aside, every fear, every weight, every ache, wound, battle.

Not long ago, I didn’t really know this Jesus. I questioned a lot of things. And I do not believe questions are wrong— I think questions are amazing. I think questions are godly. I think God gave us beautiful brains, and that he welcomes questions, and challenge.

Not long ago, I wasn’t so sure about Jesus. Why, God, didn’t you wave your all-powerful hand and just forgive us, without this whole Crucifixion thing? Why did your Son have to die? It didn’t seem to make any sense.

But a friend told me something striking— God could have done anything, but he chose to do what he did through Jesus to show us. Jesus was the ultimate act, the ultimate display of God’s love and forgiveness. Out of this questioning, out of the dark places, God shone light, transforming my doubt into a soul-deep appreciation of Him that otherwise may have remained more surface-level, more at-a-distance.

The rise requires a fall. Stumbling leads to standing. My God is reaching out his hand, always.

He welcomes seeking, searching, doubt, wondering. He welcomes them, and he gives an answer to all doubt by coming to us as Jesus Christ. I can doubt a lot of things. But there is one thing I cannot indulge doubt in: that God loves me with a force that cannot be stopped.

And Christmas is a reminder of it, a time to celebrate this love, this little baby Jesus that played and grew and learned and walked as a man on earth in order to display this overwhelming, unstoppable love.

There’s a song I heard for the very first time on the radio this holiday season. It’s called “Christmas Everyday” by Unspoken, and it’s very catchy. It also carries a profound message.

“Through the year we don't have to wait / Cause it's Christmas everyday,” the lyrics say.

What! It’s Christmas everyday? Well, Jesus is loving you everyday. Jesus is alive everyday. God’s choice and sacrifice survive time, an eternal act. Every day, for the rest of eternity, Christ lives on, forgiveness lives on, love lives on. And we live with Him.

This is what Christmas means to me, at this point in my life, at 20. This is what I wish to share with you. Merry Christmas to all— you are so very, deeply loved.



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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
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