The New Year always has me feeling funky. On one hand, I realize another year of my life passed means the closer to its end is approaching, but on the much happier and optimistic other hand, I recognize that with each passing year I grow as a person and become increasingly a contributing member to our society with my own experiences and moments, no matter how small and insignificant I may be on this Earth. 2019 wasn't the smoothest year in my life, but there have been some victories worth celebrating.
Here's ten of them;
1. I went out of the country for the first time!
GiphyI saw Niagara Falls in Canada on my way to the Toronto international airport, where I flew to SPAIN! I've always wanted to live a life full of traveling, experiences, and learning. My trip felt like my life was truly beginning.
2. I applied for and was accepted for the major I finally decided to pick!
GiphyWith the future always so uncertain and terrifying to me, deciding what I wanted to major in wasn't something I felt completely prepared to do at seventeen. While going with the flow, discovering myself, and learning that my major wouldn't define what I would be forced to do for the rest of my life, I managed to pick something competitive, apply for it, and be accepted. I put some serious effort into my application and it worked out really well. I can't wait to start my fourth semester of college with an officially declared major! :)
3. I finished my first year of college!
GiphySpeaking of college, my first two semesters came and went in the blink of an eye. Picking up and moving hours away from my family and friends to a strange place knowing next to no one and living with seventeen complete strangers by myself is possibly one of the hardest things I've had to do in my life so far. Yet I did it and I did it with strength. I built so much for myself here in Athens, and I'm just getting started baby.
4. I got a bunch of new and exciting jobs!
GiphyNot only did I earn these positions, but I went way out of my comfort zone to get there! One of them was an amazing, pretty competitive opportunity that I'm so excited about and another is a seasonal job I'm hoping to keep outside of the holiday season. I'm experiencing new and exciting things than I'm used to and it's thrilling!
5. I learned that I'm not a hard person to love, despite what I may think sometimes
GiphyMy dating history is not the brightest and happiest thing that's ever happened to me, in fact, it's definitely one of the darkest experiences I've ever had. Healing has been hard, but luckily I have the kindest, gentle, and most caring beacon of light to lead me through my darkness and protect me from myself and everything else. Even though I had been told over and over again that I'm not good enough and been dragged after someone abusive that hardly cared about me for years, I'm doing better with someone worlds better. I still have a long way to come, many more ups and downs to face, but it helps to know I have the right person by my side to help shoulder the immense weight I feel.
6. I turned 20!
GiphyNot only is it now 2020, but I'm also twenty! My teens have ended and my twenties have begun. So much has changed with me and my life from age ten to twenty, and I'm sure I'll be just as shocked at my transformation when I turn thirty! Although there's no need to talk about that just yet, my twenties have barely started. If anyone's gonna show the twenty's AND my twenty's who's boss, it's me dammit.
7. I've matured (even if it's just a little bit)
GiphyI've noticed a teeny tiny change in my behavior. My mom and I get along better than ever before, I can control myself and my emotions better than I have in the past, and I can stand to reflect on myself and my behavior without cringing sometimes! Starting to act my age a little I guess . . . but only sometimes ;) because I'll never grow up.
8. I developed a skincare routine!
GiphyIt may not work amazing, but one of these days I'll crack the code for my skin.
9. I've found some pretty bangin' music!
GiphyFinding music I love on my own has been difficult, but I've been working on it and I've liked a lot of the stuff I've discovered. I've tapped into music love banks I didn't even know that I had.
10. I've truly discovered feminism!
GiphyMy Women's Gender and Sexuality class was definitely a highlight of my year. I've learned so much about feminism, what it is, what it can do for me, and what it can do for everyone. I decided that I am and will for now on be calling myself a proud feminist and looking out at the world around me with a more refined feminist lens than ever before. I will join the fight for equality for all, so everyone better watch out.
So much has happened, so much to be proud of, and so much to look forward to!
I can't wait to take all that I've learned in 2019 (and all my teens!) into this next decade of my life.
Before you get too wrapped up in a new you this New Year, look back at all the positive things you've done this past year before ridiculing yourself for the future :)
Happy New Year everyone!